To Be Like Him
by NoleeMarieLacroix
Summary: Years have passed since the day Rebecca's life changed. Now a recognized war hero, she has come home to face down her demons. The truth, once she hears it, sends her down the road of revenge with two possible outcomes: avenge her father or turn out like the man who murdered him.
1. Prolouge

Title: To Be Like Him

Plot: Years have passed since the day Rebecca's life changed. Now a recognized war hero, she has come home to face down her demons. The truth, once she hears it, sends her down the road of revenge with two possible outcomes: avenge her father or turn out like the man who murdered him.

Rating: M+ for talks of war, death, PTSD, and acts of violence and sex.

Disclaimer: Except for the Prolog and Epilog, the chapter titles are all song titles or lyrics. S.H.I.E.L.D, The Avengers, and almost all members of both are not mine. Rebecca Coulson and the rest of her platoon are mine.

Prolog

Sixteen years ago, everything in the life of Rebecca Coulson had ended abruptly. She remembered the promise her father had made to come back safe, had kept it in her brain the same way she kept those collector cards in her wallet. Agent Phil Coulson had died defending the meek and innocent, something that Rebecca swore to do the rest of her life. In school, Rebecca made sure to look out for those who needed it. Tony and Steve couldn't have been prouder.

Tony and Steve raised her right, each aiding in a different aspect. When she became the student body president or brought home another report card with top grades, that was Steve. When she came home after prom wasted or spent time in her room alone that was Tony. Her personality was a combination of the two: always looking for the right thing to do but at the same time wanting to stay to herself. With their help, not the help of Emilio and Annie, who acted as if the two year absence when she was a child meant nothing, she graduated with top marks.

After graduation was yet another debate she had unto herself and within the members of her surrogate family. Steve pushed for a career in the military, citing that it would be good for her temperament and would help her get through college when she was ready. Tony, on the other hand, pressed for Rebecca to follow a passion and go to college which he would pay for, simply for the fact that she would be safe at home. Rebecca debated it for a while before she, alongside Emilio, decided to join the military to defend those who needed it.

Military life suited Rebecca. It was something that she could excel at and excel she did. At the young age of 20, only two years after joining the military, Rebecca Coulson became a recognized war hero. She refused to leave any man or woman behind and often faced down dangers that she swore to never write home about. Surely Steve and Tony would demand her to come home and Tony had enough money to make her.

Everything was going great in her life until the explosion.

Her platoon had been traveling in a convoy. Emilio had been driving, Rebecca sitting in the back with her teammates Troy Burton and AJ Simpson. They had been joking, teasing AJ for a letter he had received from his fiancé. The car in front of them had exploded, causing their own car to flip. In a mess of glass and broken steel they laid there. Rebecca's eyes were the first to open and though she felt a warm trickle of blood coursing down the side of her face, she had to make sure the others were safe. She turned her head, noticing Troy laying there with a lifeless look in his eyes. It was to late for him. Crawling forward, she realized she couldn't feel her leg. That didn't matter. What mattered was saving the others.

Hearing the coughing of someone, she saw AJ laying on the ground, half out of the car with his arm trapped under the metal. He was just a kid, only 18. "Becs…god Becs…I can't feel my arm…" he sobbed, looking at her. She didn't have the heart to tell him but the arm wasn't attached anymore.

Rebecca managed her way out of the broken heap of metal, noticing that her leg was severely snapped. Helping them was helping her pay no attention to her leg. "A.J…I'm gonna pull you away from the car…"

"But my arm…" he sobbed, looking at her.

"Shh, shh," she replied as she pulled him away, making sure he wasn't looking at his missing arm. "I have to bandage this up, okay AJ?"

"It's…oh…god…" AJ sobbed as he looked at his arm before turning his head to vomit. He passed out, the blood loss immense as Rebecca removed her shirt, revealing a black tank top, as she used the over shirt to stop his bleeding. One of her men was dead, another close to it, and she had yet to see Emilio.

Her eyes scanned the area before she leaned back against the sand. Annie would never forgive her if she couldn't bring Emilio home safe. But the pain in her leg was tremendous and she was having a problem seeing anything. Hearing a voice call out, she narrowed her eyes to focus on Emilio digging through the wreckage, looking for something. Horsley she called out, "Emilio…here…"

Her friend turned to look at her, letting out a breath, "Thank god…where's Troy and…and AJ?"

"Troy's dead," Rebecca replied softly, her eyes closing. "AJ…his arms gone and he's passed out. You…you okay?"

"I'm fine Becca, I dunno how I got the least of it but I did," Emilio replied as he crouched to wipe the blood off of her face, "Med evacs on its way…god your legs bad…"

"Make sure they help AJ first, he's worse off…" Rebecca replied, eyes closing heavily. As they closed, she though she saw a familiar figure in the distance. That green armor…the pale skin…she swore she had seen it before.

Nine months passed: six months to heal and another three to go through physical therapy. There was a remaining limp but that was not the issue. The issue was the honorable discharge. She didn't know how to take it, how to move on with her life. Two things filled her mind: what would be in her life now and who exactly was the man she had seen in the last minutes of consciousness.

**A/N: This is short for it is the prolog. Chapters will be longer!**


	2. Home

I: Home

It had been years since Rebecca Coulson had been back to New York City; she just wished she was home under different pretenses. The horrors of the last nine months, of that bomb going off and ruining the convoy, played in her mind as if it had just happened recently. She knew it was foolish but for the past nine months she had been hoping to return to duty, to make something of the lives over there. But she was injured, damaged good, to her military no matter what good she had done to the troops.

The plane ride home was dreaded, the entire platoon riding in due to the trauma they had been through. Emilio hadn't slept for a day, possibly haunted by the fact that he was the only one to go uninjured. AJ had grown sullen for the time it took him to recover, not only the loss of his arm falling heavy on his chest but the loss of Troy. The two had been friends for as long as Emilio and Rebecca had, practically family. Rebecca looked out the window, mind wandering to Troy's family. He was a father, a husband. As much as telling the wife that her husband wasn't coming home broke her heart, telling those poor kids was worse.

As the plane landed, Rebecca straightened her dress uniform. She stood, gripping the cane she was using to walk these days. It was beautifully crafted, made of oak with a handle carved in silver. She limped beside Emilio and AJ, waiting for the man to help remove the casket. Family waited at the airport terminal: Emilio's wife and Rebecca's friend Annie stood there with a newborn in her arms, AJ's fiancé Heather held a sign with 'Welcome Home Soldiers' written on it, and Troy's wife Lisa and his sons Ethan and Evan stood there somberly. Rebecca's eyes scanned for her family, only to see Happy Hogan standing there to take her to Stark Tower.

"Lisa, I'm so sorry for your loss," Rebecca softly whispered as she patted her hand to comfort the woman, "Troy was a good man with a good heart."

"You saved everyone but you couldn't save him," spat Lisa angrily, yanking her hand away from Rebecca. "I came here to collect the body, not to hear your lies." She pulled her hand back to slap Rebecca but Heather caught it before she could deliver the hit.

"She feels guilty enough, Lisa, it wasn't her fault," Heather admonished.

Rebecca lowered her head, turning to head towards Happy. She was guilty; she should have died or been able to save everyone. This, of course, shouldn't have mattered to her. She did the best she could and she should have realized that. Deep down she knew but the guilt outweighed the other feelings. Happy smiled at her when he saw her and hugged her, "Hey kid."

"It's good to see you too Happy," smiled Rebecca, "Where's Tony or Steve? Don't tell me they sent you to get me cuz you were badgering people again."

"Nah, I gave that up a long time ago. My job is to protect Mrs. Stark and the kid," Happy smiled at her. While Tony and Steve had looked after her most of her life, Happy and Pepper played a role as well. Happy had shown her the joys of shows like Downton Abbey and kept her in top shape for soccer while Pepper had kept up the female influence. "Tony and Steve are at Stark Tower. We're having a dinner."

"Good, I'm starved," Rebecca tried to smile as she got in the limo, "So tell me, how is everyone?"

"As good as can be, Tony's taking to being a dad rather nicely," Happy chuckled, looking at her through the rearview mirror as he started the car. "Everyone misses you. Steve hasn't done much since you were deployed. We were all worried about you but for some reason he was worried the most."

Rebecca frowned, "He has nothing to blame himself for. Steve did everything that he could to make sure I was on the right path."

"You know him," Happy shrugged, "always taking blame for other people's follies. How's the leg?"

Rebecca clammed up but answered softly, "I'm fine, and its fine. Happy…I'm gonna nap. Jetlag and all."

Noticing that she didn't want to talk, Happy rolled the small window between them up. Rebecca lay back in the seat, eyes closed as she drifted off to dreamland.

_She dreamed of the figure. In the dream, she stood at a fork on a path. On one side she saw her father, Phil Coulson, dressed in his favorite suit and Captain America tie. Behind him laid a road of rubble, leading to a broken city. On the other was that figure: a pale man with eyes bluer than any she had seen before dressed in gleaming green and gold armor. The staff he held in his hand also seemed familiar and yet she could not place it. Behind him stood a shining utopia, a city of riches. Both her father and the imposing figure had arms outreached towards her, beckoning to her to follow them._

She was confused. Who was this man, dressed as a medieval warlord and impeccably handsome? What did the cities behind her father and this man stand for? Questions rolled through her head and when she felt a hand on her arm, she grabbed it angrily and opened her eyes to come face to face with a grimacing Happy, "Um…Becs…hand…" he grunted before pulling away.

Rebecca looked apologetic, getting out of the limp, "Sorry I just…sorry…bad dream…"

"Don't apologize, I get it. Tony use to be the same way after Iraq," Happy replied with his head hung. He ushered her inside where Rebecca felt much more at home.

"Welcome home Miss Carson," the voice of J.A.R.V.I.S greeted as she was inside. Rebecca remembered how the voice scared her when she was a child. Now it was something she welcomed to hear.

"It's good to be home Jarvis," Rebecca smiled as she looked around the lobby. It hadn't changed since she had been home last. "Top floor or is Tony in the lab?"

"The top floor Miss Coulson," J.A.R.V.I.S replied, Rebecca getting the feeling that J.A.R.V.I.S was happy to hear her voice as well by the one in his own voice. It was odd to think that a computer could have emotions of his own.

Rebecca pressed the button, standing still as she waited. Her thoughts were of how Steve and Tony would react. The elevator dinged and opened, Rebecca limping into it. She waited with baited breath as the elevator opened, revealing to her a room set up for a party, her welcome home party to be exact. "Happy…you said dinner. Not party."

"You know Tony," Pepper said as she stood and walked over to hug Rebecca as she entered the room, "Everything has to be a party."

"Aunt Pepper," she smiled as they hugged, "good to see you. Where are the others?"

"Ew it's Rebecca," came a voice from the couch. Rebecca turned her head to see Tony and Pepper's thirteen year old son, Eddie. Life had finally caught up with Tony and now he had a teenage son.

"Eddie," Rebecca laughed as she hugged the teenager, who had only been teasing her, "How goes it squirt?"

"Made track team," Eddie beamed as he texted on his phone, "I also play guitar now."

"Cool," Rebecca smiled as she turned to see Steve and Tony. She snapped to attention in front of Steve, hand raised in a salute.

"At ease soldier," Steve replied, saluting her back. There was a moment before the two hugged, Steve rubbing her back, "It's good you're home."

"It's good to be home," she smiled as she pulled back, the words falling like a mantra on her lips. Hugging Tony she asked, "Haven't had an attack in a while have you?"

Tony shook his head, "Not in a while. How's your…"

"Not hurting me today," replied Rebecca before he could ask, "Mind if I grab a beer, Tony?"

"Yes, I do. Beers for pussies," Tony joked, "Let me pour you a tumbler of scotch." Rebecca sat on a stool, eyes scanning the crowd. The days party went well, Rebecca actually enjoying herself amidst the dark feeling of the day. Once Happy had gone to work and Pepper and Eddie had gone to bed, the three still sat in the room: Tony on a stool to her left and Steve to the right.

"Have you thought about where to go from here?" Steve asked Rebecca who was looking down into her glass.

"Dunno. I don't have any skills and I don't want to go to college yet," Rebecca shrugged, "No place would hire me without skills."

"What about working for Stark Industries?" Tony asked as if it was obvious, "I'll hire you on as an assistant."

"Would you?" Rebecca asked.

"Sure," Tony shrugged, "you can take directions well. That much I know."

Rebecca smiled and hugged him, "Thanks Tony. I'll crash on the couch tonight but once I get my own job, I'll buy a place."

"I have a buddy who needs a roommate," Steve smiled, "Clint Barton, maybe you know him?"

Rebecca laughed, remembering the man well. "Clint's an old friend. I'll stay with him if he doesn't mind."

"Nah, he's had problems with his hearing aids for the last year," replied Steve. It was all a lie, a ruse to make sure that she didn't go poking around for answers. The older she got, the more Steve and Tony worried that she would find out the truth about the death of her father. "Now…as for your role with S.H.I.E.L.D…" Steve started but was cut off.

Rebecca felt adamant about the role she would play with S.H.I.E.L.D. When she was a child she wanted nothing but to be like her father, to be an agent. However, when he died she realized that she wouldn't be compared to her father in a business where they expected everything he could do. Rebecca was not her father and didn't think she was half the person he had been. "I'm not my father. I won't devote myself to S.H.I.E.L.D like he did…" Rebecca replied calmly, "I'm sorry but I just can't…"

Tony nodded, "Understandable. I can understand not wanting to be like dad. Just know the option lies if you want it."

"It's late guys, you should both sleep," Steve replied, not wanting to argue with Rebecca about S.H.I.E.L.D

"Yeah and I need to see Pepper," Tony nodded in response.

Rebecca watched them disperse, walking over to the couch and changing into a set of pajamas she had with her before falling asleep for the first time undisturbed in a month.

**A/N: Slow chapter, I know, but I had to set everything up for the later chapters. Let me make this clear: as she did when she was a child the only heroes she knows are heroes are Tony and Steve. This chapter's song title is Home, a song by Phillip Phillips.**


	3. Work Sucks, I Know

II: Work Sucks, I Know

A/N: Song lyric taken from All The Small Things by Blink 182

While being employed by Tony Stark sounded exciting and interesting in theory, the truth couldn't be farther from the truth. The clock had gone off at eight that morning, J.A.R.V.I.S announcing loudly that it was time for work. During her service overseas, Rebecca would have been up at five and ready to start the day. Now she felt like sleep was the only thing she wanted to do. She groggily sat up, eyes half open as she heard footsteps in the room. "You up yet Becky?" came Tony's voice.

She sat up, digging through her bags to find something to wear. Deciding on a black pencil skirt and white button up shirt she went to stand, "What do I have to do today? I mean, I thought Pepper ran the company."

"She does run the company but you're not working for corporate Stark Industries. You're working for private Stark Industries," Tony smirked, "Like as in my suits?"

"Tony I thought you gave all that nonsense up years ago," Rebecca half smiled, deciding against the dress clothes in favor of a Black Sabbath shirt and jeans, "It's a young man's game, being a hero."

"I'm a young man, 50's the new 20," Tony laughed as he turned his back to allow Rebecca to change. "Want anything for breakfast? Happy brought us a dozen donuts."

"Chocolate or glazed?" Rebecca asked back as she buckled her leg brace, sliding it on over her pants. She hated it, feeling crippled when she wore it.

"You know Becky…I could take a look at that leg of yours if you want me to," Tony replied but feeling as though any comment he made on the subject would upset her, "I mean, I have some great doctors who can look at it for you."

"I wouldn't have to wear a brace anymore?" Rebecca asked, raising an eyebrow at Tony. The thought of being able to walk without a cane or wearing a brace excited her, "I…I'd like that Uncle Tony. I'd really like that."

"I'll make a call later, see how long it will take them to see you," Tony smiled as the elevator opened, showing Steve wearing a jogging jacket with the hood up and shorts, "Look who it is back from the morning run."

"Where you two headed?" Steve asked with a questioning look.

"The lab, Tony neglected to tell me that I was working for Tony Stark and not Stark Industries," Rebecca informed, giving Tony a look before smiling at Steve.

"So old man Stark wants you to help relive his glory days by helping to build a couple new suits?" Steve asked teasingly, staying in the elevator to go down to the lab with them.

"Old man Rogers was out doing the same damn thing," Tony smirked, gesturing to the circular red, white, and blue shield Steve was hiding behind him.

"You guys hide these things like I dunno who you were," Rebecca smiled as she picked up the shield. It felt right in her hands but she quickly admonished the thought. "I knew that you were Cap'n America before I ever actually met you and Tony showed me the lab when I was young."

"Yeah but we're older now, no longer in our prime," Steve replied, taking the shield from her and exiting the elevator with the other two. He sat on a stool while Tony stood at a work table with Rebecca. "We're never going to be heroes like we were."

Rebecca chuckled, turning to look at the suits that designated Tony as Iron Man. With a smile, she reached out to touch one. "What was it like? Being a hero?"

"Every time I put on that suit to take a flight I felt as if I was free," Tony wistfully answered as he looked at the suits fondly.

"You should know how a hero feels Becca," Steve smiled at her, "you saved lives over there, you're a decorated hero."

There was a silence, Rebecca's hand fidgeting with her pants leg as she sat back down. She wasn't a hero. She did what she did because it was the right thing to do for her country. Rebecca pulled her hand off of the suit, crossing to the drafting table and looking at the newest blueprints Tony had drafted. "So this one…what's it doing?"  
"Nothing more than any of the others really," Tony pointed out, "I'd like to see if I can't put a couple thrusters in the shoulders as well as the hands to make it supersonic. Weapons are the same as usual."

"So nothing to drastic, good," Rebecca tried to act like she knew what was going on but decided against it, "I dunno how to make that happen."

"Thank God you're pretty, you definitely don't have your pops brain," chuckled Tony as he grabbed the welding torch. He didn't realize what he had said at first but once he did, he looked up at her ashamed, "Oh god Becky, I'm sorry!"

She held up a hand, eyes lowered, "I know I'm not him Tony. I don't have his smarts r his talents. I'm Rebecca, not Phil, Coulson." The biggest peeve she had was that she didn't have the legendary brains and cool, collective, rationale that Steve and Tony had told her that her father had.

"Kid I didn't….it's been hard on all of us since his death," Tony replied, putting a hand on her arm. "Let's just get this done, yeah?"

"You know…" Rebecca started to lose her temper but she took a deep breath, running her hands through her hair. "Yeah, let's just get this done."

The rest of the day was spent with muttered questions about robotics and where tools had gone. By the end of the day, Rebecca had earned the coffee she went out to get with Emilio. "So old man Stark's working you in a field you know nothing about?" Emilio asked as they sat outside the café.

"Robotics. I'm basically there for moral support and to hand him tools," Rebecca nodded as she sipped her Iced Café Mocha, "If someone's not there to feed his ego, he gets crabby."

"Sounds like Tony," chuckled Emilio, "Annie and I are moving to Jersey with her parents. She wants to be close to them with the baby. Will you be fine here in New York alone?"

"You know me, I meet new people easily," smiled Rebecca. There was a comfortable silence between them, the sort that happens between good friends, before Rebecca spoke again, "I had a weird dream…"

"Was it the chicken singing I Will Survive again?" Emilio asked playfully.

"No, less what the fuck and more I'm not sure," Rebecca replied, "I was standing on this fork in the road. One side was broken down and my dad was leading me to it but the other had a beautiful city and this handsome guy wanted me to follow it."

"Odd, I'd talk to someone who knows dreams about that or check it in a dream dictionary," Emilio replied as his phone rang. He checked it before looking sheepish, "That's Annie about tonight. Check ya later?"

"Sure," Rebecca smiled, "drinks are on me, I'll pay."

As Emilio left, a handsome man walked over to Rebecca. He was dressed in an impeccable olive green suit with a gold scarf, "My dear, may I comment on how beautiful you look today?"

Rebecca looked up from her cup, surprised to see the same man she swore she had been seeing in that dream, or at least someone who reminded her of him. This man carried no staff but instead used a cane to walk. "Um…thanks…who are you?"  
"The name is Loki Laufeyson," he grinned as he sat across from her, "I overheard the conversation you had with your friend. Perhaps I can help you, I know a thing or two about dreams."

Rebecca hesitated but, contrary to what she had said to Emilio, friends didn't come easy for her. "That would be nice…" Something was telling her not to trust the man, a feeling deep down as if she had seen him somewhere other than the dream, but she chalked that one up to nerves.

"Well it seems as if you have two choices to make: one that leads you down a road of despair and desolation as signified by the broken city while the other leads you to glory and honor as signified by the glittering utopia," the man, Loki, smiled. He took a sip of his own drink before continuing, "The two men symbolize the choices. Perhaps they initiated them?"

"That sounds logical," Rebecca replied softly. She checked her watch before standing, collecting her things with one hand while the other gripped her own cane. "I should go…"

Loki pulled a card from his pocket, "My number should you need me again. Perhaps we could meet for drinks?"

Rebecca brushed a strand of her hair behind her ear, "That would be nice…"

"Then I will see you later, Rebecca Coulson," the man called after her as she left.

It wasn't until she arrived home that she realized she hadn't told him her name.


	4. Take These Broken Wings and Learn To Fly

III: Take These Broken Wings and Learn To Fly

A/N: Song lyric taken from Blackbird by Paul McCartney.

There were moments of happiness Rebecca remembered from her childhood that involved friends of her fathers. One such even was learning to shoot a bow and arrow from her father's friend Clint Barton. She hadn't seen him since she was seven, the day her father died to be exact. Arriving at the address Steve had given her before she left for coffee with Emilio, she was glad to see he hadn't changed much. His hair had grayed on the sides and top, his face had wrinkled a bit more, but he was virtually the same.

A smile crossed Clint's face as he opened the door and saw Rebecca. The last time he remembered seeing her was before he had spent time as the trickster god's puppet though there were vague memories of Phil and Rebecca hiding from him. He had worked for years to get rid of the red in his ledger, to erase the evil sins he had committed. Seeing Rebecca was bittersweet and he hugged her close, "Tony and Steve told me you'd be here today."

For Rebecca, the hug was much needed. The thought of that man, Loki, slightly paranoid her. How long had he been watching her? What did he know about her? While it paranoid her, it also slightly excited her. There was an air of mystery, perfectly hidden from her. With a smile, she hugged back and spoke a little louder than usual, "How are you Clint?"

"Better when I don't have someone yelling in my ear," Clint laughed as he pulled back, "Come in, I'll show you around the place. It's not huge but we have everything we need."

"Steve said your hearing aids weren't working," Rebecca frowned as she entered the apartment. It was quaint and intimate, the living room adjoined to two bedrooms and a shared bathroom. "What do you do for food?"

"Eat out mostly. When Bobbi was still around, she used to cook for me," Clint smiled softly as he picked a picture of himself and a beautiful blonde woman off of one of the end tables. He set it down and smiled at Rebecca, "If you got a boyfriend, cherish him. Don't take the relationship for granted."

"Had one when I was first deployed. I got the female equivalent of a 'Dear John' letter," Rebecca shrugged, looking at the picture and noting the wedding bands. "What happened to her?"

"I worked too much, she worked too much. We just never made time for each other," shrugged Clint, "Steve and Tony brought your things by. You're in the second bedroom."

Rebecca smiled and nodded, "Tryin' to get rid of me early?"

"No," Clint replied, shaking his head adamantly, "Not at all! I was just sitting down to talk to Tasha on Skype."

"You two are still friends?" Rebecca asked, leaning her back against the couch. "I always thought you two would end up getting married."

"Marriage wasn't for her…" Clint replied softly, "So we stayed friends. She's still my best friend." There was an underlying tension as if Clint wasn't telling the entire truth. The room fell silent except for the sound of American Ninja Warrior playing on the television. She took a deep breath before standing.

"Well I'll leave you to your Skype," Rebecca replied as she exited the living room in favor of her own room. She changed into a nightgown before smiling at the warmth of the gray blankets as she drifted off to sleep for the evening.

_Blood. Lots and lots of blood. It was everywhere and she couldn't tell if it was her own at first. Looking out in front of her, she saw a horrid sight: Clint lay with his throat slit, Tony had a hole in his chest where his heart should have been, and Steve was gasping for his last breaths. "You…you…" Steve gasped for breath as he reached a hand out towards her._

Feeling a hand on her arm, she woke up swinging. Two punches were landed: one to the person's face and another to the gut. She pushed them to the floor and delivered a kick to the gut before realizing it was only Clint. "Don't touch ya when you're sleepin', got it…" Clint coughed as he pushed himself to stand.

"Clint I…I didn't meant to…" she gently stammered, head hung as she sat on the edge of the bed. She put her head in her hands, frowning.

"No worries," Clint smiled though blood covered the area between his nose and upper lip, "How long have you had it?"

"Had what?" Rebecca asked, looking up from her hands.

"Posttraumatic stress disorder. The signs are kinda there. I mean, you're violence for one and then how quick you were to apologize. I've seen a few guys, buddies of mine from college, go through it," Clint replied, sitting next to her.

"I…I don't have…I…" Rebecca wanted to dispute it with him but she knew better. Ever since the day she had lost Troy and had gotten injured, she had been quick to anger and a bit paranoid. Sobbing she threw her arms around Clint, "How do you deal with it?"

"With what?" Clint furrowed his brow as he leaned back.

"You know…being different…" Rebecca asked, biting her lip as her hand came up to touch Clint's ear. She didn't mean to be crude so she quickly apologized, "I'm sorry…that was…"

"No, no it's a viable question. I was younger than you when this happened to me," Clint remembered, a sour taste in his mouth at the memory, "I wanted to impress this girl…so I picked up archery. I was okay with it at first but I was a better pick pocket. This guy I did small jobs with and belonged to the circus my adoptive father was a part of built a bomb, we were gonna fake an insurance claim. There were a few kids still inside the tent and he didn't care, he was gonna hurt them. I saved them but the blast, which I managed to survive, left me deaf. I learned how to read lips, to pick up body language. You, in the same vein, learned how to walk again after your leg injury."

"But PTSD-"

"Is a disability that you and your loved ones have to deal with," Clint cut her off as he wiped the last remaining droplets of blood off of his face with his hand.

"Why were you in here?" Rebecca asked as Clint stood.

"Heard you whimpering from my room and I wanted to make sure you were alright," Clint shrugged, "So are you?"

She wanted to tell Clint about the dream but she remembered his body lying there. That fact, coupled by her violent outburst, may have scared him and she wouldn't have a place to live anymore. She decided she would call that man, Loki, tomorrow and speak to him about it. "Just a nightmare. Thanks for checking on me."

Clint smiled, "Anything for Phil's little girl."

As he left the room, Rebecca laid back down on her side on the large bed. She was broken but Clint had helped her realize something: anything that is broken can be repaired.

She could be repaired.

**A/N: Bobbi is Bobbi Monroe, the hero known as Mockingbird. I also know Clint's backstory wasn't spot on but I tweaked it. I also feel the need to clarify ages. Steve is about 40, Tony's 50, and Clint (as I write him as the youngest Avenger) is 38, Natasha being only a year older than Clint.**


	5. Sweet Dreams Are Made of These

IV: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of These

A/N: The song title is taken from Sweet Dreams, originally preformed by The Eurythmics. I myself feel the Marilyn Manson version fits better.

With the dreams and last night's event still haunting her, Rebecca woke up the next morning with a rather foul disposition. She laid in bed for an hour before deciding to get up and start the day, one goal in mind. She had sent Tony a text about how she would be coming in later, needing to meet someone before she decided that it was a bad idea. Loki Laufeyson had said he knew a thing or two about dreams. She needed to know if last night's nightmare of a massacre meant anything.

She hemmed and hawed for ten minutes about if it was a good idea or not. The man had admitted to listening in on a private conversation between herself and Emilio. Even worse, the man had known her name. That worried her but she eventually decided he simply over heard it or, as men who seemed to be of high learning and culture often do, he had been reading the paper and her platoon had been mention. Dialing the number on the card, Rebecca sat for a moment, waiting for the eventual pick up. "Hello, you have reached Loki Laufeyson. This is he speaking. Who is this?"

"Mr. Laufeyson, this is Rebecca Coulson. I don't know if you remember but we met the other day at Starbucks," Rebecca stated, though the way he had answered the phone threw her off. It sounded as if he had come from an older generation though in appearance he looked no more than thirty.

"Ah yes, Miss Coulson. I was hoping you'd call. What is it you need?"

"This...this is going to sound silly but I had another dream and I was hoping you could analyze it for me?" Rebecca asked, hoping she didn't sound crazy.

"Alas, it was for something other than drinks," he chuckled into the phone, "yes I can analyze any dream that you have had. That is what we psychologists do."

"You're a psychologist? So...you deal with people who have all kinds of abnormalities?" Rebecca asked as she remembered what Clint had mentioned about posttraumatic stress disorder.

"I prefer to think of the abnormalities of the human species more as diseases. Abnormalities sound as if they are something ugly, something terrible. A disease is something that can be cured," Loki replied as if speaking to a child. "If you are in need of a psychologist, I would be willing to obliege."

"That would be nice," smiled Rebecca as she looked into the mirror across from her. She looked terrible and decided a shower and a nice pair of clothes wouldn't hurt her.

"I have no appointments today," Loki replied, smiling at the notion of Rebecca coming to see him. "Perhaps we could meet for drinks, we could talk then."

"I eventually have to go in to work. Why don't we just meet for lunch around noon or so?" she questioned.

"Lunch it is," Loki smiled, "the little Starbucks I met you at. See you then."

As he hung the phone up, Rebecca couldn't help but think about the language he used. He appeared to be around her age but the way he talked seemed much older, almost archaic in nature. He was obviously a man of culture, someone who enjoyed the finer things in life. She decided she'd do her best to look nice. She showered, dressing in the white button up shirt and black pencil skirt that she had almost wore the day before. Not being able to bare her hair being down, she pulled it into a ponytail before putting on the slightest amount of make-up. She exited the bathroom to see Clint relaxing on the couch in a pair of black sweatpants. "Hey Becs. Lookin' good."

"Thanks Clint, I have a lunch date today," Rebecca smiled as she grabbed her purse from the living room table. She looked at the large bowl of Lucky Charms that sat on the living room table, "You think you got enough cereal there?"

"Just enough," smiled Clint as he kicked his feet up on the table. "You going on a date with that guy you just called?"

Rebecca raised an eyebrow as she looked at him, "How? How do you manage to hear me?"

"Years of on the job training," smirked Clint, "Where you goin' on your date?"

"It's not a date like that. This guy's a psychologist," Rebecca answered his questions as if she hadn't heard the second one. She left off the part about dream analysis, not wanting Clint to get worried that she was crazy. "He can help me."

"Just remember, shrinks are always looking to improve the people who talk to them. Trust me, I know," Clint bitterly stated, "If he comes back here and he tries to dissect me psychologically, I'll put an arrow though his eye socket."

"Sheesh," Rebecca said, rolling her eyes. "He's a nice guy. Just because he's a shrink doesn't mean he's going to dissect you psychologically. It's like you being, or you were, a government man. Just because you guys were government it doesn't mean you were a lying, cheating bastard."

"I thought you military people all liked your government," Clint laughed jokingly.

"I trust aspects of government," Rebecca corrected. "Any ways, I'm meeting up with him at a café near here. Left my number on the fridge. Need anything while I'm out today?"

"Nah, got groceries earlier in the week. See if the bookstore has anything good, I guess," shrugged Clint, "I may be gone when you get back, I got work."

"Sure," Rebecca nodded as she left the house. The walk to the café was a pleasurable one, no matter how many looks she got for her limp. The café came into view and she could see the gentleman who she had called sitting on the terrace sipping from a glass coffee cup, pinkie extended. "Mr. Laufeyson," she smiled as she walked to the table.

"Please, Rebecca, call me Loki," he smiled charmingly, taking her hand and placing a kiss to the top of it. "I was glad you called. Judging by the way you're looking, you walked?"

"Do I look bad?" she frowned, straightening her shirt. She went to pull out the chair in front of her but Loki beat her to it. She sat as he pushed in the chair for her.

"Nonsense, you look splendid. No, no. I ask because you seem to be in a spot of pain," he corrected as he sat back in his seat. "Call it intuition."

"I'm fine, Loki," she smiled, relaxing in her seat. "the walk wasn't bad. In fact, it was quite invigorating. Now tell me, I'm sure I've heard that name before. Why did your parents name you Loki?"

"It's an old Norse name," smiled the man, sipping his drink. "My family believed in the old gods so they named my brother and I after them. Why did your parents name you Rebecca?"

"Dunno," Rebecca shrugged, "my mom died when I was four and my biological dad was gone before I was born. The man who adopted me, who I considered to be my real father, died when I was seven."

"A most tragic life. The parents I told you about were my adoptive as well," Loki replied, a touch of sympathy in his eyes, "I am sorry for your life."

"Don't be," Rebecca smiled kindly, "I grew up in a loving household."

"That is always a good thing. So, tell me, why did you call me today?" Loki asked, giving her what was an almost knowing grin. She almost decided to call him out on it but decided against it.

"A couple things actually. Do you want to start with the dream I had or with what me and my roommate believe to be Posttraumatic Stress Disorder?" Rebecca chuckled glumly.

"Let's start with the easier of the two. Tell me about this dream," Loki replied as he stopped the waitress so that Rebecca could order.

"A caramel macchiato," Rebecca nodded before the girl bustled off. Rebecca turned to look at Loki. Her voice lowered and she said in a voice barely above a whisper, "There was so much blood and…and three of my father's best friends were dead. I…I think I did it…"

"Oooh death is always an interesting topic in dreams. Tell me, these friends of your father, who are they? How did they know him?"

"Well two of them were the ones who took me in after my father died, the other just worked with them," Rebecca answered.

"And how did your father perish?" Loki said as he ran a finger around the rim of his mug, "If you don't mind me asking."

"He save a few men and women where he worked when some bad people attempted to destroy it," Rebecca softly spoke again, trying not to recall the day her father died. "He was a hero."

Loki pondered it for a moment before speaking, "This is only on interpretation but perhaps these men have kept a secret from you. Were they murdered in an intimate way?"

Rebecca took in a deep breath, remembering the bodies of her loved ones. "Yes…very…"

"A secret it is then. Tell me, did you see anything in the dream that connected it to previous ones you may have had?" Loki questioned.

Rebecca sipped her macchiato, thinking to herself. She had no recollection of anything but she furrowed her brow, closing her eyes in thought. She gasped, her eyes snapping open again. "A staff. It…it was in my hand, it was the same staff that the man who wasn't my father had in the dream about the path."

"Perhaps they are connected," Loki mused. "If it was the same as in the dream before, perhaps you and the other gentleman are connected somehow?"

"Maybe…" Rebecca replied, "do…do you have any other interpretations? You said death is an interesting topic…"

"Well death often means a birth while a birth in a dream often means a death," was the reply he gave, "perhaps the gentleman you are intimate with has gifted you with a child?"

"Oh no I'm not…I haven't been with anyone since before I came back from Iraq," laughed Rebecca. She had forgotten the PTSD, it being something she would rather not speak about anyways. "What about you? Surely a cultured man like yourself has someone they love?"

"You believe me to be cultured? Tell me, it is the way I dress or is it the way I speak?" he asked, quite charmingly.

"Both really. Your voice mostly though," Rebecca answered, "it's something old fashioned. But you didn't answer me: girlfriend or no?"

"No, no. The last girl I showed my interest in my brother decided he wanted. I do enjoy my privacy. In fact, I do believe that you are the first non-work related person I have carried on a decent conversation with," he smiled kindly at her, "I don't make friends very easily."

"Neither do I," Rebecca half-smiled, "I use to, a lot earlier in high school. I was in almost every activity I could be. My tour of Iraq did a number on me."

"Is that how you injured your leg?" Loki sympathetically asked.

Rebecca hated the fact that he had pointed out her flaw, feeling as if he pitied her, "I'm having surgery to fix it eventually."

"Why? It doesn't define who you are, it's just a part of you. It builds character," Loki replied with a smile that could warm the hardest of hearts.

Rebecca smiled, a slight blush creeping to her cheeks and giving them a ruddy hue. "That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said about it…" There was an awkward pause between the two before Rebecca stood, "This was nice but I should be going…I have to get to work and…"

Loki raised a hand, cutting her off, "Say no more. I have overstayed my welcome. Perhaps I can offer my opinion on a matter?"

"You haven't overstayed your welcome!" Rebecca assured rather quickly. She quieted down, looking at her hand on the table. "I mean…your opinion on what?"

"Keep a dream journal. If you want, lunch can be a weekly thing," Loki offered, "talk to the men who raised you as well. See what secrets they hide."

She nodded, reaching out to shake his head but instead receiving another kiss to the top of her hand, "See you next week?"

"Next week," confirmed Loki.

Rebecca started to walk towards the direction in which Stark Industries lay. Halfway down the street she paused to look over her shoulder at where she had left Loki.

She didn't see him amongst the patrons.

A/N: Thanks everyone for reading/reviewing so far! I know it's a bit dry in places but I hope the characters seem spot on to you. If you have questions, don't be afraid to ask.


	6. When The Truth Comes Out

V: When the Truth Comes Out

A/N: Song title taken from a song from the Scrubs musical episode. Eclectic variety of music, I know!

The first interpretation of her dream by Loki stuck in Rebecca's mind as she entered Stark Industries. If it was true, Steve and Tony and Clint were hiding something from her. It was something that she had to confront them about. She just wasn't sure how to bring it up. It wasn't a topic one could just bring up with no provocation. "Good afternoon Miss Coulson. Should I tell Mr. Stark you have arrived?" J.A.R.V.I.S asked as Rebecca stood in the lobby, waiting for the elevator to come on down.

"Please don't J.A.R.V.I.S," replied Rebecca as the elevator opened, "Just tell me which room he's in. In fact, if you can just control the elevator and send me there, that would be great."

"As you wish Miss Coulson," J.A.R.V.I.S answered. The button for the top floor lit up, showing that Tony wasn't working in the lab, either having already quit for the day or that he was waiting for her to get started. When the elevator opened, she was alerted to a conversation going on at the table between some very familiar faces. Tony sat at a table, in the head spot, with Steve to his left. The faces that surprised her sat to Steve's right and the other put a space between Clint and Tony. To Steve's immediate right sat Dr. Bruce Banner, who Rebecca had not seen since her childhood. On the other side of Bruce sat the blonde from the picture Clint had showed her, Bobbi Monroe. Separating Clint and Tony sat Natasha Romanoff, her hair just as red as ever. The spot on the other side of Clint was empty, as if being saved for someone. The conversation grew quiet as Tony spotted her, raising a hand to silence everyone.

"This feels an awful lot like an intervention," Rebecca carefully replied as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"No intervention, we haven't had one of those since we had to talk Bruce into stopping the science so he could sleep at night," Clint snickered.

"Watch it Barton," Bruce warned, though his warning sounded quite friendly. He stood and went over to Rebecca, "Glad I could see you before I had to leave. How goes it kid?"

"I've seen better days Bruce," frowned Rebecca as she hugged the man who she hadn't seen in ages. Unlike Natasha and Clint, Bruce didn't even write her as she got older. "What's going on here?"

"S.H.I.E.L.D executive business," Bruce replied, "Tony said you turned down the offer to be an agent. Why?"

"Just grew up is all," shrugged Rebecca, "I'm not a hero like my father was; I'm not great at science like you, and I'm not as trained as Tasha. Even if I was to want to be an agent, I'm damaged goods cuz of my leg. I'd be no use to anyone."

"Who says?" Clint asked over his shoulder, "I'm deaf. Most agencies wouldn't take me because of that. S.H.I.E.L.D gave me the chance to make something of my life. You were already a hero; S.H.I.E.L.D would give you something else to do."

Rebecca shook her head, "Nah, don't tell Mr. Fury…"

"Fury died when you were gone," Natasha replied as she stood as well, hugging Rebecca with one arm around the shoulders. "Old age. New replacement chair was named though."

"Tony?"

"Nah, I'm just sitting in," Tony chuckled, "Maria's meeting with the president."

"Aunt Hill?" Rebecca chuckled, "Makes sense for it to be her. I only ever knew one agent more dedicated." She smiled smally as she remembered her father's dedication to S.H.I.E.L.D.

"He would have been it…" Bobbi spoke up, standing and crossing over to her to offer a hand. "Bobbi Monroe. Tony and Steve told me about you Miss Coulson."

Rebecca shook her hand, "Call me Becca. Clint told me about you two." Judging by the looks that crossed both Bobbi and Natasha's faces that was the wrong thing to say. Turning to Steve and Tony, she stated, "I need to speak to the two of you in private."

"We were almost done here," Steve replied, "We'll talk in a few. Go to the gym or something."

Always one to listen to Steve, Rebecca headed down to the gym area. She changed into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt Pepper kept in there for female guests. She decided to jab at a punching bag, the thought of the question she had to ask weighing heavily on her mind. It seemed like a long time before the gym doors opened, Steve and Tony entering. "Calm down soldier," Steve replied in a commanding tone. He recognized the look in her eyes, as if she was a million miles away.

"Sir yes sir!" Rebecca stopped, snapping into attention. Her hand was in salute form, back straight and feet together as she stood in the attention position.

"At ease Becca, you're no soldier here," Steve replied placing a hand on her shoulder. "What did you want to talk to Tony and me about?"

Rebecca's eyes dimmed, looking around with a realized look. This was Tony and Steve, family, not her superior officers. "Guys I…I've been having these dreams…nightmares. Bad ones. I talked to my therapist about it-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, when did you start seeing a therapist?" Tony asked her, raising an eyebrow in a questioning fashion.

"I'm not technically seeing a shrink. He's a friend of mine whose been helping me with dream analysis," Rebecca explained, "Anyways...I had a particularly bad one the other night. I…I killed you two and Clint…"

"Deep," Tony replied with a frown, "But in my experiences in this would show that dreams are just that. There's nothing you have to worry about with that. Besides, even if you did go batshit and try to kill us, we've had more combat experience than you."

"That's not the point. The point is…well…he says that because you were killed in manners that were intimate you've been hiding a secret," Rebecca stammered.

The room was silent as if something terrible had just been discovered. Tony looked at Steve reproachfully before looking back at Rebecca. His tone, unlike usual, was calm and collective. "Did he say about what he thought that secret was?"

Rebecca shook her head, "No but…" there was a pause, one which felt like it could tear apart the entire room for the tension and gravity in it, "But if you guys lied to me, about anything when I was a kid…tell me. I'm old enough to handle it now…"

"Alright, alright, alright. I admit, Santa's not real. The Tooth Fairy and Easter Bunny are shams too," Tony joked as he threw up his hands. It was a joke, his way of breaking the tension. He knew this day would come. He just didn't know when. The lied had been one he told to protect a child. Rebecca was no longer one.

"Tony, it's time we told her. She's an adult now," Steve replied in a hushed tone. The secret had weighed heavily on his heart for years. He never admitted it to Tony but when Rebecca had been a child, Steve had often thought of revealing the truth to her.

Rebecca sat on the nearest chair, looking up at Tony and Steve. They had kept something from her, "I…I'm ready…"

"Do you remember the day your father died?" Steve asked, sitting across from her. He had never forgotten that day nor had he ever forgotten Agent Phil Coulson. The man had given his life for a cause he truly believed in. There was nothing more heroic than that.

"More than you guys know," was the somber response given by Rebecca. That promise her father had given, that he would be back for her, still remained in her heart. "I always wonder if the people he saved realize what he gave for them. I wonder if they're grateful that he saved them from death. Why?"

"They thank God every day that he saved them," Steve assured as he took a deep breath. He couldn't get the words out to tell her the truth.

"Rebecca…you're father died battling a man S.H.I.E.L.D had taken prisoner who had escaped. There was no second explosion. He was stabbed through the chest from behind," Tony admitted.

Like a jolt of electricity, the truth crashed into her. There was no heroic moment of saving a life, no death in a fiery inferno. Agent Phil Coulson had died fighting a man who took the cowards way out and stabbed him through the chest from behind. "You LIED to me!" she shouted, coming to her feet. "Sixteen god damn years I thought my father saved innocents from an explosion! All he did was die in combat!"

"Rebecca Emery Coulson!" Tony shouted back, "Your father caused more lives to be saved that day than you could ever imagine! Because of his death, an entire team of heroes came together to save the city of Manhattan!"

"And because he foolishly rushed into battle alone, I lost a father! You would never put Eddie through that trauma and you're twice as reckless as my father was!" shouted Rebecca. Tears had formed in her eyes, cascading down her cheeks. "Who did it? Who was the bastard who killed my father like a coward?"

"A man whose long since been forgotten," Steve attempted to calm her down, "He'll never bother anyone ever again."

"I want a name because unless he's dead, I'm going to hunt him down and I'm going to kill him," Rebecca spat viciously. She meant it. She was going to kill the man who had ruined her childhood just like he had killed her father.

"Revenge is never the answer," Tony snapped, though the words were true. "It always leads to the one who wants revenge turning into a monster just like the one they want revenge against."

"Who!?" screamed Rebecca, hands balled into fists.

"Stand down Rebecca!" Steve yelled. The two exchanged a dark glance, almost as if they were about to fight. "Stand. Down."

"I'm not a soldier anymore," Rebecca informed, "Stand down means nothing." She was in the right frame of mind, not feeling the role of a soldier. "I'm going to find the man who murdered my father and when I do…" She shook her head, storming off to the elevator. She wanted to leave, to go somewhere to be alone. A shooting range preferably.

"Where are you going Beck?" Tony questioned as he followed her, making sure she didn't do anything stupid.

"Out."

"J.A.R.V.I.S put the house on lockdown," Tony called out as Rebecca got to the door. She turned, looking at Tony coldly.

"Unlock the house. You taught me how to hack into the system when I as ten," Rebecca replied, rolling her eyes. She recalled the lesson fondly, remembering Steve's protests. "I want to get out!"

"I'm not having J.A.R.V.I.S unlock the door," snapped Tony with a stern look, "You're going to your room here and you're going to calm down."

"Screw it," Rebecca swore as she stormed off to her room. It hadn't changed since she was in high school, instead just gained more boxes. She hurt, both her heart and her head. She had been lied to since she was a child by the two men who she trusted most. Her sobbing brought her to dreamland, a dream lighter than before filling her head.

_ It was a beautiful field, a sky full of red stars above her. It was a beautiful spring day and as she glanced at her reflection in a puddle she could tell she was in her military uniform. She heard someone clear their throat and turned around to see her father. Though she was angry, he hugged her close. The anger, the pain seemed to melt off of her shoulders. "Daddy…"_

_ Phil chuckled, hugging her tighter before looking her over. "A military hero. I'm so proud of everything you've ever done."_

_ Rebecca blushed, glancing down at her feet, "I did what you expected of me. You wanted the best out of my life."_

_ "I did everything I could for you but I…I messed up…" Phil frowned as he stared into the darkness of the night. "I broke my promise to you…"_

_ "You tried," Rebecca comforted as she patted his hand and looked into the darkness with him, "This place…where are we?"_

_ "One of the only safe places left. You have a choice to make," Phil spoke as the outlines of Clint, Steve, Tony, Bruce, Natasha, and a long forgotten man with long blonde hair appeared in the darkness, "one that may very well destroy you. Promise me you'll do the right thing when that time comes."_

_ "I'm gonna kill the man who killed you when I find him," vowed Rebecca._

_ "Promise me when the time comes, you'll do the right thing Agent Coulson," Phil demanded, smiling at her with the term agent on his lips._

_ "I promise…"_

A/N: The dream was longer than the other two but I wanted to fit in more symbolism.


	7. Apologize

VI: Apologize

A/N: Song title taken from Apologize by OneRepublic. Short chapter but it sets up a lot.

After she jotted down the dream from the night before, Rebecca knew she had to apologize to Steve and Tony. Though they had lied to her for sixteen years, Rebecca knew why they had. Both Steve and Tony had lied to her to protect her from whoever had committed the murder of her father. Though Steve had promised the man was long gone, she felt that he was lying to protect her again. She dressed in a plain gray tank top and blue jeans, feeling the need to look casual. She made her way downstairs to where Tony sat with Pepper and Eddie. "Morning…"

Tony looked up at her, the expression on his face one of pain and hurt. "Good morning Rebecca…I was just leaving for work. Hope you have a good day."

"Tony wait…" Rebecca called out as Tony stood to leave.

"Work is waiting downstairs," Tony replied as she turned to look at her, "I have to get some things done."

"Anthony Stark you listen to her," Pepper ordered as she looked at her husband, "She may have blown up at you last night but considering the circumstances, I think she should be allowed to be angry. She's trying to apologize to you."

"Pepper she…" seeing the look that Pepper gave him, Tony let out a defeated sight. "She is coming down to the lab with me…"

Rebecca followed Tony to the elevator, giving Pepper a thankful smile over her shoulder. Once down in the lab she threw her arms around Tony, "I'm so sorry about last night…"

Though at first Tony was reluctant to accept the apology, he patted Rebecca on the back comfortingly. "I'm sorry..I really am. I should have told you from the moment it happened how your father really died. It was my fault, not Steve's. He was going to tell you that day."

"So…why did you not tell me?" asked Rebecca, sitting on a stool near the large central command for J.A.R.V.I.S.

"You were seven Rebecca. You just don't tell a seven year old that her father was murdered in cold blood," Tony snorted, looking down at the girl. "It's not like you can tell a seven year old that."

"No, I suppose you can't," Rebecca frowned, running a hand over her face, "Tony…I really am sorry. Last night I just…everything is catching up to me. Military life…I…I made mistakes I never told you two about…"

"You've kept secrets of your own huh?" asked Tony with a smile, "Lemme guess, you forged a couple signatures for bad report cards in high school?"

"No…that man in my platoon…Troy Burton…before I knew that he was a member of my platoon…" Rebecca fidgeted with the hem of her tank top, "before I knew that he was a member of my platoon, I met him in a bar and we had a one night stand."

"Oh…wow…then that woman who Happy said was gonna hit you in the airport was…"

"His wife," Rebecca confirmed. "She blamed me for his death but deep down she just hates me because of that. I can't blame her but I didn't know then…"

"Becky, kid, you got no idea how many wives and girlfriends I slept with before I was married to Pepper," Tony comforted, "Just because you do doesn't make you a bad person. Did you love him?"

"Yes, he was a good man. He loved his kids but he and his wife were always at each other's throats. I dunno why they just didn't get a divorce…"

"Sometimes people stay together for the kids," Tony shrugged. "I can't imagine leaving Pepper though. She's my world."

"She balances out your wild side," chuckled Rebecca, sitting back in her chair.

There was a silence between the two before Tony asked, "I never was told…exactly how did…you know…"

"Road side bomb," Rebecca somberly answered, guessing what he was going to say.

Tony flinched, a fresh sheen of sweat covering his now gaunt face. It was as if memories had come back to haunt him. "I…I know what that's like…" he brought a hand up to his chest almost subconsciously.

"Is that what-"

"Made me the man I am today. You should go make sure Steve gets an apology," Tony nodded before taking a deep and calming breath.

Rebecca stood, hugging Tony, "Where is the old soldier?"

"Visiting your dad's grave," Tony answered, "we still go at least once a year. We went more when you were younger so we could tell him everything that happened."

Rebecca nodded and left, though she swore she saw tears on Tony's face as she left. Was it really a coincidence that the same military accident had happened to the both of them? It seemed unlikely. The thought plagued her as she made her way to the cemetery he father had been buried in. Steve sat in front of the grave, a worn look on his face. Sometimes it was hard for Rebecca to remember he was much older than he looked. She kneeled on the dirt next to him, "Dad really idolized you, you know?"

Steve turned his head to look at her, "I know. He was a hero, he inspired the Avengers to fight. He saved an entire city because of it."

"I wish I had met the other Avengers," Rebecca smiled softly, "I'm sorry about yesterday…"

Steve nodded before turning back to the grave, "Tony and I should have told you the truth sooner. We…we just…"

"Wanted to protect me, I know," Rebecca nodded, "You know…S.H.I.E.L.D will always need an Agent Coulson…"

"Does that mean you're thinking of joining?" Steve asked.

"I…I think so…" Rebecca answered. She wished she could say it was for a selfless reason but she knew it wasn't. The closer she was to S.H.I.E.L.D's files, the closer she was to finding out the name of the man who killed her father.

The closer she was to her revenge.


	8. Its Time To Begin

VII: It's Time To Begin

A/N: Song lyrics taken from Its Time by Imagine Dragons!

The S.H.I.E.L.D base was like nothing she remembered. Instead of a helicarrier, it had been turned into an earthbound and secluded base in upstate New York. Days after her selfish decision to become an Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D, Rebecca Coulson was finally getting to tour the base. The very though gave her a feeling of wonder, as if she was a child again.

Of course, the fact that she was a second generation agent who was carrying on the name Coulson brought several whispered rumors. Some said she was there to collect long forgotten belongings of her father. Still others claimed she was there to take over the executive position of Maria Hill. Neither one were true of course. She was there to start grunt work as an actual agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. The government had sent her discharge papers to Maria Hill, proving Rebecca to be the soldier S.H.I.E.L.D may need.

She entered the executive office of Maria Hill, dressed in her military dress uniform with her papers in one hand and her cane in the other. The office was neatly decorated but the thing that stood out the most was a picture on the wall of Phil, Nick, and Maria. There was a nicety about it, something long forgotten. It was a moment of friendship and family love. "You have his eyes," came a voice from behind her. Rebecca turned around to see Maria, her hair having grayed significantly since the last time the two had seen each other. The fact that Maria thought Rebecca's eyes were like her father's made Rebecca laugh: there was no blood connection between her and Phil. "Becca, it's good to see you."

Rebecca smiled and shook Maria's hand, "I was just admiring the office. How's it feel to be called Director Hill now?"

"A bit bittersweet. Means I'm the oldest remaining officer in S.H.I.E.L.D. It would have been Tony but he turned it down. You look good in your uniform, your father would be proud of you," Maria smiled as she crossed to her desk, "Steve says you want to join S.H.I.E.L.D."

Sitting down on the chair nearest her, Rebecca nodded. "Yes ma'am. I tried to avoid it as much as I could but being an agent is what I was raised to do. The only time I feel like I can contribute is when I'm saving the lives of others."

"You sound just like your father. May I see your files?" Maria asked as she held out a hand for the manila folder that Rebecca held. Once handed over, Maria leafed through it. Though it took a minute, Maria eventually asked, "It says here you have a leg injury?"

"Yes ma'am. When I was doing a tour of Iraq my convoy was hit by a roadside bomb. We lost a member, I suffered a leg injury, and a member of my platoon lost an arm," Rebecca informed, "I'm an injured soldier but I promise I can still function."

"S.H.I.E.L.D is always looking for new members who are the top in their fields and at the peak of physical perfection," Maria started, "What makes you think that you're a potential candidate?"

"Ma'am, I can do a lot of things. I'm a good hand to hand combatants, I'm useful with a gun, and I can survive in the harshest of environments. I also love protecting the meek, those who need help. So while I may not be at my physical peak, I can learn to be the agent that the agency needs," Rebecca informed.

Maria smiled and closed the file, "You've got heart and spunk. Plus we're always looking for members with experience that we can put with those who don't have a lot of on the field work under their belts. I think I have just the team of agents to place you with."

"Thank you ma'am," smiled Rebecca as she stood, "Do you want me to meet them here or do you have some place else in mind?"

"The conference room down the hall will be fine," Maria nodded, "Do you plan on living here or simply being called in when we need you?"

"I'm living with Clint Barton, ma'am. Whenever you need me, I'll be here," Rebecca answered.

"You and Barton aren't…involved are you? He's much older than you," Maria informed with a reproachful look.

"No! He's like an older brother to me," corrected Rebecca, "I'll be down at that conference hall if you need me." She headed down to the conference room, sitting alone for what seemed like forever. Finally the door opened and a team of three young men and two young women entered. "This is my team?"

"This is our new member?" a man asked, plopping down in a chair and propping his feet up on the table. "She don't look like much." He was thin, with a sloppy manner of dress and an almost permanent smirk etched onto his face.

"Trust me, Mr. Crispin, she's a very powerful fighter. Her hand to hand combat rivals yours," Maria smiled. "Boys, girls, this is Rebecca Coulson."

"Coulson?" a man who stood in the back asked, as he fixed his glasses. He was dressed neatly and seemed almost pleasantly shy, "As in _that_ Coulson?"

"Rebecca Coulson, his daughter. A military hero," a black haired woman who looked like she could hold her own in a fight informed, "She's finally joined?"

"Yay! I'm always up for new friends!" a blonde with her hair in pigtails giggled.

The last man was silent, looking over Rebecca who finally spoke. "It's nice to meet all of you. Yeah, I'm Rebecca Coulson, Phil Coulson's daughter. Um…I'm sorry I don't know any of you…"

"Where are my manners!? I'm Emily and that's my big brother Josh," the peppy blonde smiled, pointing to the man who had been silent. They were at two different ends of the spectrum, "I'm the teams demolition expert and he's a weapons expert."

"Allow me to introduce myself, I'm Alec Lennox. I do the teams tech," the man with the glasses smiled and waved.

"Jana Bisinger, languages and foreign intelligence," the other girl grinned.

"And I'm Hotty McHotterton," the man who was sitting grinned, "I'm an expert in love. If you want I can show you sometimes."

"That's Luke Crispin, our hand to hand combatant," smiled Jana, "It's nice to have another girl on the team."

"You all have areas you're good in. I'm not…I can't…" Rebecca frowned, feeling inadequate.

"You're experienced," Maria comforted, "These men and women have never had your chances. You can guide them in the field."

She hadn't expected to be assigned to a team but as she looked her group over, she felt a sense of pride. "Then I'll guide them in the field. Enjoy your last night of freedom. Tomorrow we hit hell week," Rebecca walked with Maria until she felt her phone go off. She answered it, looking at the text.

_**To: Becca**_

_**From: L.L**_

_**Meeting tomorrow for lunch and a dream analysis sit down?**_

With a smile on her face, she sent back the answer:

_**To: L.L**_

_**From: Becca**_

_**Sounds good to me!**_

With a look back over her shoulder at the group, Rebecca smiled. She had her own team and it was only a matter of time until she grabbed the name of the man who caused the death of her father.

Life was good.


	9. Trust In Me

VIII: Trust In Me

A/N: Song taken from Trust In Me from The Jungle Book! Thanks everyone who has read/commented/favorite this story so far!

The day before had been filled with excitement, having met her team of agents for the first time. They had decided to meet for the first round of training that night, giving Rebecca plenty time for lunch with Loki. The dream she had that night; however, was one of the most baffling yet. She was in the throne room of a glittering castle where a man, the man who looked like her friend Loki, knelt on the steps in front of the throne. In her hands she held the crown, an old Celtic looking one, which she placed on Loki's head. She saw the sword hanging at her side, recognizing herself as dressed in old knight's garb. The man sat on the throne and she passed up a goblet full of water, handing it to him before kneeling at his feet.

When she woke the next morning, after she wrote down the dream into her journal, she decided breakfast was a must. She left the bedroom to see Clint on the couch, talking in a hushed tone with Natasha. Deciding to eavesdrop for a moment, Rebecca listened in. "I know Tash and I've come to grips with the fact you don't want to be married. I…I still love you…" Clint whispered as he took one of her hands in both of his, a sad look on his face.

"Clint I've told you before I love you but I won't be a good wife," Natasha frowned, "I'm a free spirit and I could never be tied down."

Clint nodded and leaned in to kiss her, "I can live with us never being married. What I can't live without is you." The two kissed and Rebecca felt a smile creep onto her face. Clint truly did love Natasha if he felt like she completed him in such a way.

"Touching moment," Rebecca grinned as she let her presence be known. Natasha pulled away from the kiss with Clint and pretended to fix her hair, "Don't worry, the secret is safe with me."

"I have to go…" Natasha whispered as she stood, gathering her jacket and purse from the couch, "It was nice seeing you Becs…Clint…"

Clint watched her leave, running a hand over his face. He looked up at Rebecca before slumping over, "Thanks Becs…"

"I'm sorry Clint…" Rebecca replied as she sat next to him. "What was that all about?"

"We had a discussion about us," Clint replied, not looking at her, "Do you know the reason that Natasha and I never got married?"

"I'm assuming it had something to do with that conversation?" Rebecca asked, turning to look at him.

"Tasha feels like she wouldn't make a good wife because she's too much of a free spirit. Would you ever tell a man if you felt like that Becs? Or would you suck up your doubts and marry the man?"

"To be honest…I don't ever see myself getting married," Rebecca frowned, putting her head on the heels of her palms, "I just only ever men one man who I would have married and he's gone now…"

"What about the man who you met the other day? Did you two hit it off?" Clint smiled as he looked over at her.

There was a smile that flitted across her lips, "I think it went well. He was a gentleman to me, a perfect gentleman. I'm meeting him later in the day for lunch and a dream analysis. I still have to change and apply makeup."

"You're pretty in what you have on kid," chuckled Clint as he stood and ruffled her hair. He crossed over to a small mini-fridge that sat on a counter, "Heard you got the R-Team."

"You mean my team of S.H.I.E.L.D operatives? Why do you call them the R-Team?" asked Rebecca looking over her shoulder at him.

"Rookies. The guys never get called to the field cuz of their issues," Clint shrugged, "If it was up to me, I'd bring them with me on missions."

Rebecca was not aware that her team had issues but she understood that anything was possible. She shrugged, catching the soda that was tossed her way. "I don't care if they have issues or not, they are my team. I'm training with them later."

"You'll lead a good team," Clint assured as he crossed back to the couch and sat down, "I think there's a Two and A Half Men marathon on FX. Wanna watch it?"

"Nah, I'm gonna hit the shower and change for lunch," Rebecca smiled as she left the room to gather her things for a shower. Judging by the amount of green Loki wore, it was a color he enjoyed. She decided on a green sweater, a black mini-jacket, and black leggings. She braided her hair down the back and put on the slightest traces of makeup. She deemed herself worthy before exiting the bathroom. She saw Clint having dozed off and covered him up with the blanket on the back of the couch. She jotted down a note to Clint about where she was headed before grabbing the keys to the Corvette and leaving. The drive was short and Rebecca made sure she looked okay before getting out, her dream journal in her purse.

She sat at the usual table, smiling as she saw Loki heading over with two cups. He was dressed in a brown blazer over a green button up and brown slacks. "Rebecca I do love that color on you," Loki smiled as he sat down across from her, "Caramel macchiato?"

"Yes please," Rebecca smiled as she took the cup from him. Their finger tips touched and a frown crossed her lips. His hand was colder than her iced drink, "Your hand is so cold…"

Though there seemed to be a troubled look crossing his face, he shook his head, "My hands are always this way. Perhaps you are getting sick."

"I hope not," Rebecca frowned as she sipped her latte, "I can't afford to get sick. I just can't get sick."

Loki smiled at her, "Tell me, did you wear green for me?"

Rebecca blushed, "Well I just saw how much you enjoyed the color and…"

"And you thought I'd enjoy seeing such a lovely color on you," Loki knowingly looked at her, "The color green, my parents taught me, is a color that means life and fertility. I am a man who does enjoy his life so."

"You're an enigma Loki," Rebecca smiled softly, "An intelligent enigma I feel has so much knowledge about just about everything."

Loki laughed, "My parents didn't value my knowledge as much as they valued the abilities of my elder brother. I am glad you enjoy it. Do you wish to start the dream analysis?"

Rebecca hesitated and shook her head, "No I…if it's all the same to you I would much rather talk with you. I mean…if that's not to out of line…"

"Out of line? I get to enjoy coffee with a lovely and intelligent young woman. How could interesting conversation be out of line?" Loki smiled at her, placing a hand on hers. Again it felt like ice was biting at her flesh.

Rebecca smiled and sipped her latte, "Well…um…I guess it's not. What interests you Mr. Laufeyson?"

Loki smiled back, sitting forward in his chair, "I'm partial to a lot of topics. The arts, literature, even math. I do believe; however, that I would enjoy learning about you."

"Learn about me? I'm not very interesting," Rebecca stammered as she looked into her cup.

"Unless I'm mixing up news articles, you were in Iraq. Surely you have to have some war stories…" Loki wandered off, giving her a look.

Rebecca's mind wandered to Iraq, the look in her eyes one of rememberance. It was something that mead her feel as if she was in danger, "I'm…I'm sorry…I would rather not…"

"I am so sorry I placed you in a state of discomfort," Loki apologized with a deep breath, "Perhaps we should speak about something else. What do you do for a living?"

"I'm in government work," she replied, knowing she wasn't allowed to tell him what she actually did, "It's quite boring. File this, run this to them. The usual stuff."

"What department?"

"Does it matter? They all do the same thing," smiled Rebecca with a chuckle. She sipped her drink before asking, "You're a psychologist but do you do private practice or work at a hospital?"

"Private," smiled Loki, "I don't do well in a hospital. The sick…I'm very empathic. I feel their pain…"

"I feel the same way about some people, I can feel their emotions," Rebecca admitted. She brushed her hair over her shoulder, smiling, "You're interesting. Most guys aren't as intelligent and classy as you."

"Most women aren't as accepting as you. Call me frank but I believe that you and I could be good friends," Loki smiled as he continued softly, "and maybe that could lead to more."

"You…you think it could?" Rebecca asked shyly.

"If you want we could meet for drinks and a date on Friday," Loki smiled, "Would you enjoy that?"

"I would," Rebecca smiled. She fished in her purse for the small notepad she had written down her dreams in, "Can we look at one of these?"

Loki opened then notepad to the first dream she had recorded, "Red stars, your deceased father, your friends in the dark, and you in a military outfit. All key signs."

Rebecca nodded, "Yeah…it was a rather intense dream…"

"Well red stars are interesting. They mean trouble or misfortune. Your father, as you have told me before, is deceased. That means business is pulling heavily. Your friends in black means unusual trouble while you as a soldier is a fulfillment of ideals," Loki informed, leafing through the pages. "Seems as if there will be a problem…"

"A problem? Or a problem to come?" asked Rebecca worriedly, "My father told me that he had a choice for me to make. Do you think they are related?"

"They could be one in the same," Loki agreed, "Let us take a look at this other dream shall we?" He looked over the dream and then back at Rebecca, "So this fellow looked like me?"

Rebecca blushed deeply, "Kinda…"

"Well wearing a sword is to mean you'll fill a public position with honor. I suppose this signals your job as a government worker. The goblet being given is a sign of illicit pleasure while the crowning is proving your own worthiness. Seeing someone else on a throne means you'll gain wealth through others favors," Loki answered. "A dream much lighter in nature than the other. This could mean anything really. I'm sorry I cannot decipher this one any further."

"It's alright," Rebecca conceded, "I'm glad I met you. It was almost like fate or destiny or something…"

"If you believe in that sort of thing," Loki agreed, "I hate to cut this short but I must be on my way for work. I shall pick you up Friday for our date?"

"Friday sounds lovely."

**A/N: I may be gone for a while. The semester is over and we don't have the net at my house. I promise to post on this as often as I can. Also, you should all totally check out the Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D commercial on Youtube!**


	10. Because A Fighter Never Quits

IX: Because A Fighter Never Quits

A/N: Song title taken from Warrior's Code by Dropkick Murphy's.

After the dream analysis and the set-up of a date on Friday, Rebecca wasn't in the same frame of mind she had been in that morning. For starters, talk of the dreams analysis weighed on her shoulders. The one about the conversation with her father didn't bring the happy and bright feelings she felt it, it was a bad omen. On the reverse, the dream that had felt wrong to her meant good tidings. The one thing that stood out the most; however, was the problem to come. She didn't like conflict as much as she use to.

The sun was high in the sky by the time Rebecca reached the S.H.I.E.L.D base in upstate New York. She parked the car and made her way to the conference room she had first met her team in. There they were, gathered together to start the days team activity. The most noticeable thing was that, with some changes, everyone was dressed in a similar fashion. The group wore a black jumpsuit with their nametag attached to the front. Each person wore something that seemed to mean something to them. Jana wore earrings that were the Chinese symbols for peace and strength, Emily wore her hair tied back into pigtails with what seemed to be a red and black zip tie, Luke had a set of rings on his fingers that resembled brass knuckles that said Bada Bing, Alec's glasses were his personal flair, and Josh wore a rubber band around his wrist with a paper clip attached. "Why aren't you in uniform?" Jana asked.

"Uniform?" Rebecca asked, raising an eyebrow, "You mean those jumpsuits?"

"Duh," Luke rolled his eyes, "every S.H.I.E.L.D operative has to wear the same training uniform. Once the agents are out in the field; however, the uniform is up to them."

"Don't be an ass Luke," Emily playfully shoved him, "She obviously just came from a date. Besides, I don't think she's been fitted."

"I don't even have an i.d yet," admitted Rebecca, sheepishly.

"Then we can't practice yet. I mean, I could hack into the system and get the doors open but Maria said that wasn't a good thing for me to do within my own agency," shrugged Alec.

"We could always get to know each other. I mean, conversation never killed an agent," shrugged Emily. She sat in a chair at the table, "Why don't you start Becs?"

"No, no, no. I'm leader. It was your idea, Em, you go first," Rebecca smiled at her, sitting at the head of the table.

"Well, Josh and I were born to a con man and a stripper. They didn't care about us so our grandparents on our mom's side raised us. I found I liked explosions and Josh worked with our granddad at his gun range," Emily spoke, "Maria found us when Josh got in trouble for illegal gun smuggling. Maria let us join, taught us discipline. We've worked for the agency since. We don't get put out in the field cuz of our…um…problems…"

Rebecca hesitated, "Problems?"

"Didn't Maria tell you? All of us on the team sort of have issues," Emily softly replied, "Josh is mute and I sorta have panic attacks."

"A friend of mine, Clint Barton, told me earlier today. I don't care what problems you all have, you are talented agents," Rebecca assured the lot of them. In a way she was happy to know that Josh wasn't just hateful, he honestly could not speak. "Alec, why don't you go next. Add what they say is wrong with you?"

"Well my old man was a computer programmer, he worked on some heavy stuff. My ma was a teacher, worked well with others. They raised me, an anti-social, bipolar, computer hacker and technician," Alec replied grumpily, "Bi-frickin-polar."

"Bipolar disorder," nodded Rebecca, "it doesn't mean anything terrible. Just that your emotions are a bit out of whack."

"He had days where he doesn't talk to us," Luke replied with a snicker, "ever have a tech guy who doesn't do his job?"

"It must be bad but he'll do what he can for us on those days. What about you Luke? What's your history?" smiled Rebecca.

"Well my mom was a teacher and my dad taught martial arts. That's where I learned everything. Personally I prefer karate to the others I know. I wouldn't say I have a problem but others might say I have a slight case of Obsessive Defiance Disorder."

"Slight," Jana asked, "More than slight."

"Fine, I don't like being told what to do," Luke shrugged.

"Hard to work with but I can," Rebecca nodded in thought, "What about you Jana?"

"Well my dad is Senator Mike Brisinger, my mom's a stay-at-home wife. I liked languages when I was growing up, had to learn 'em cuz of dad. I made them my thing."

"Do you have…you know…"

"Jana's depressive," Luke replied, "she's like my polar opposite. I'm the playful one, she's waaaay to serious for her own good."

"What about you Rebecca?" Emily asked so there would be no fight between Jana and Luke.

"My mum was a world class cellist and my dad…well…everyone here knows what Phil Coulson did for a living. I decided an agency job would be perfect for me," Rebecca replied, leaving out the part about wanting to avenge her father's death. "I…I have PTSD…"

"How?" Alec questioned.

"Just…do…" Rebecca replied. She knew it was wrong, not telling her team about her problems. That's what today was all about so far, "I…I was in an accident overseas. It's where I hurt my leg…"

"That' doesn't matter to us," Emily comforted, "We're a team, a mini family. You know…you're gonna need a codename. We all have codenames. I'm Boom Boom. Sounds childish, like Bam Bam from The Flinstones except in explosive form. We call Joshie Warzone cuz of his affinity for guns."

"I'm Techtonic," Alec grinned, "I thought it sounded really cool."

"Syntax," Jana nodded, "it has to do with languages. It was the coolest thing I could honestly think of."

"And I'm Manos. You know, as in the Spanish statement mano el mano," beamed Luke, "You need something cool. Deadshot?"

"Trigger," Alec offered.

"Patriot?" Emily grinned.

"Oooh Patriot. I like the sound of that," Rebecca smiled, "So those uniforms, how do you decide what you wear once we're out in the field?"

"I've designed my own for when that day comes," Emily shrugged, "The others will get to create their own but I have one drawn up for everyone. I could draw you one."

"That'd be nice," smiled Rebecca. "So, we're a team now. Is there anything else I should know about the lot of you?"

"Nah," Jana smiled, "Why don't you go get your id made? You can meet us in the holoroom. It's the perfect place for training."

"That shouldn't take me to long. Meet at 19:30 for our first round of training?" asked Rebecca, her own brain stuck in military time.

"Unless I'm mistaken no clock in the world has a nineteen on it," Luke snickered, looking at Rebecca, "Are you time dyslexic?"

"It's military time," Alec rolled his eyes, "19:30 means 7:30. You add twelve to whatever number, it's a 24 hour clock."

"Oh," Luke sheepishly replied, "19:30, gotcha."

Rebecca chuckled and left the conference room. It took her about ten minutes to find the place to get her id made in the maze of corriordors before she could actually get it made. It was another thing getting to the training room and by the time she arrived, she knew she was late. She slid her keycard through the port, the doors to the training room sliding open.

The room had changed since she remembered. While the training room was more like a gym when she was a child, this was just a barren room where her team stood, "What is this place?" she questioned.

"The training room. Maria found that running combat situations was more useful than just letting operatives train with gym stuff," shrugged Alec. He crossed over to a small keypad in the wall, hitting some numbers before the room seemed to shift into something completely different. It was no longer just a barren room, it was a street in downtown Manhatten. "Gotta love Stark technologies."

"Ugh, this one gain?" Luke frowned, "I was so hoping for somewhere exciting. Like London or India…"

"This is a good one," defended Emily. She looked over to Rebecca, "In about ten seconds, a horde of zombies comes through the south entrance. Our job is to protect each other."

There was the overwhelming stench of death and Rebecca knew this was the zombie horde. She noticed the S.H.I.E.L.D van behind them and grabbed an assault rifle from its place. "Luke, Jana, you two get to the building on the left. Take out as many as you can. Emily, Josh, you do the same on the right. Alec, you stay down here with me."

The group disbursed and Rebecca climbed on top of the van, perching with the gun on the room. Alec was next to her and seemed to be having trouble with getting the gun to sit right in his hands. He looked over at Rebecca sheepishly, "Um…Becs…usually I don't…I'm not…I've never been too great with guns…"

"Alec, a gun is made of metal like your computers right?" Rebecca asked as she made sure her own gun was loaded.

"Yes but…"

"Then it's technology. Do your best with it. That's what these training exercises are for, getting us to work on the things that we aren't as good with things as other people aren't." She put two fingers on the earpiece in her ear and spoke, "You guys ready for this shit?"

"Born ready," Jana grinned into her own earpiece.

"As ready as I'll ever be," Emily nodded, though there was the slightest hints of panic in her voice.

"Let's just get this over with, I wanna hit the clubs later tonight," Luke yawned.

The zombie horde appeared and Rebecca started the battle. Shots flew from all sides, even Alec managed to get a few shots in. Every thing was going fine until she felt the street shake. Emily had thrown one of her explosions into the fray. Rebecca cried out, dropping the gun and wrapping her arms around her knees. The expression across her face was one of worry and fear. She cried, unable to think and function right. "Cut the simulation off!" she heard Alec shout before she blacked out.

X XX XXX

"Good going Em, you kill her," Luke joked as Rebecca felt her eyes flutter open. The room had changed back to the barren room it was before, her group standing over her.

"Shut up," Jana replied as she shoved at Luke, "You feeling okay Becs?"

"S…sorry the explosion…it spooked me…" Rebecca apologized as she sat up, "Did we…did we win?"

"Zombies ate your face so no," Alex winced sheepishly.

"Training should be off for the day. This…I just need…" Rebecca stammered as she pushed her way out of the room. The thoughts raged in her head and she couldn't shake them. Explosions were a problem, they had been since Iraq, but something deep down told her that wasn't the reason. In her childhood, something had happened to make her afraid.

She just didn't know what.


	11. One of Those Nights

X: One Of Those Nights

A/N: Song title taken from One of Those Nights by Tim McGraw.

The drive home that night was one of thoughts. The main one that weighed at her emotions was deep down, the explosion in Iraq did not bring memories of her first. There was another explosion that she had been in, there almost had to have been. Instead of driving to the apartment that she and Clint shared, Rebecca decided to head to Tony's. If he or Steve knew, they would tell her.

The building was locked when she arrived but a well placed text and ten minutes of waiting later, Rebecca was inside and on an elevator headed for the roof. Outside Tony, Steve, Happy, and Pepper sat enjoying drinks. "Becca!" Happy grinned, handing her a beer, "Pepper just sold Stark Energy to a research team headed to Antartica. There will officially be Stark Energies on every continent."

"Congrats Pepper. Where's the kid?" asked Becca as she sipper her beer. She kicked her feet up, resting on one of the recliners that Tony had insisted the balcony needed for comfort.

"Downstairs, studying for a math test he has with J.A.R.V.I.S," Tony smiled, "boy may not be a genius like me but he's smart."

"Of course he is. Any child of your and Pepper's was bound to be smart," Steve chuckled as he sipped his own drink.

"Well gentleman, Becs, I have to be up early in the morning for a business conference," smiled Pepper as she stood, kissing Tony and ruffling Becca's hair. "Drink one for me Becs."

"And I have to get to sleep so I can escort Pepper to said business conference and Eddie to school," Happy nodded as he left the room. The roof was silent, save for the ice clinking in Tony's glass of scotch or Steve occasionally clearing his throat. The sounds of the city that never slept echoed around them: the honking of horns, the sounds of music and parties everywhere.

Rebecca finally broke the silence, a question on her lips, "Do you to ever wish you were still heroes?"

"Sometimes," Tony answered truthfully, "there are days where I put on a suit and play around in the lab. My job these days is a bit more rewarding: being a dad to Eddie and a husband to Pepper. Even mentoring S.H.I.E.L.D rookies is rewarding. All without the danger of being a hero."

"I still do what I can," Steve admitted, "I may not be protecting innocents from absolute evil but it's the small things at my age. I protect kids by keeping 'em off the street, working at soup kitchens. Sure I miss being Captain America but I still am a hero."

"Wow Steve," Tony mocked tears, "that was really sappy."

"Anyways," Steve rolled his eyes, "that question sounded like it came from somewhere. So tell me, what's on your mind champ?"

"Today during an exercise with my S.H.I.E.L.D team-"

"They gave you your own team to handle?" Tony asked, slightly worried. He was afraid the pressure would drive her mad. He remembered the pressure he had felt when he returned and he hadn't led a platoon like she had.

"Yeah, Maria said they could use my experience. That's not the point, the point is that during a training exercise today our demolitions expert set a virtual bomb off and the sound scared me to the point of a blackout. I knew part of it was from the…incident in Iraq but not all of it was. It's like I have a suppressed memory," Rebecca rambled.

There was a pause as her two mentors glanced at each other as if trying to decide who would break the news to Rebecca, "Becs…" Steve started before he stopped and looked at Tony.

"No more secrets. She's old enough to ask, I'm going to tell her the truth," Tony vowed. He cleared his throat, downed the rest of his scotch, and began again. "The man who killed your dad…the day he died…some henchmen of his broke him out and used an explosion to get our attention. You…you and your father were there when…when it…"

It was as if a jolt of lightening hit her, jarring her memories. She saw the day back then. They were headed to tell Fury, Director Nick Fury, that her father was taking her to the zoo. She remembered running through the hall, hiding behind crates from what she thought was Clint, a giant green monster and a man in medieval garb fighting. Then she remembered the promise her father had been unable to keep. "I…I remember…" she whispered, tears in her eyes.

"It's what landed you with us," Steve spoke softly, "We…we didn't want to worry or scare you."

"He gave up his life for S.H.I.E.L.D ….for freedom," Rebecca understood. She stood, kissing Tony and Steve on the head before leaving for the night. She remembered what her father had died for, she know how he died.

Now she just had to find the bastard who did it.


	12. The Joker and The Thief

XI: The Joker and The Thief

A/N: Song title taken from The Joker and The Thief by Wolfmother.

Between the training of her team and her inhability to find the name of her father's murderer, the days passed slowly until Friday night. The days were filled with combat scenarios, often ending in a team talk about what they could do to be better, and sorting through files of old S.H.I.E.L.D foes. While these guys were the worst of the worst, monsters like Red Skull and Abomination, none of them had the murder of Phil Coulson under their belt.

The nights; however, were filled with two dreams: one for each night. The first nights dream was of an apocalyptic Manhatten, cars overturned in the desolate streets as if it was nothing.

_ Her team, each dressed in an outfit that suited them, stood behind her as if they were ready to attack. She saw her own uniform in the slightly dusty window of a nearby shop. She looked like Captain America, or at least some version of the outfit. Her top was a skin tight body suit with a white star in the center and cut into the fashion of a tank top. The suit continued to the waist where it was met by a red belt with a white star in the center and from there on continued in a red color. Her boots were black combat boots, nothing special about them. What was special though was the shield in her hand: Captain America's shield._

_ "Alright team, I want us to split up. Our fellow operatives died to bring this bastard to justice," she spoke with authority, eyes narrowed on a tall skyscraper in the road in front of them. There was no mistaking it as the Stark Towers building. "Syntax, stay down here with Techtonic You'll be our tech support. Boom Boom, I'm gonna need a way in there, it's sealed up tighter than Fort Knox. Warzone, Manos, you're with me."_

_ "You sure you can take him down? I mean after-"_

_ Rebecca raised her arm to silence Boom-Boom, "He's nothing to me, let's get this done."_

That dream the first night had worried her. She knew her team was far from ready and it had seemed prophetic. The fact that she was unsure of what awaited her inside Stark Towers was another problem. Had Tony snapped and used his suits to rule the world or had J.A.R.V.I.S malfunctioned and caused mass chaos? While both situations seemed entirely unlikely, she couldn't be positive.

The second dream has been just as distressing but in a different way.

_ Dressed beautifully in a green medieval style dress, Rebecca stood on a dias in front of a man. She reached up a hand to feel a crown on her own head, marking her as a queen. That was not the shocking moment however. She looked down, the man behind her had his heavily ringed fingers flayed open over her pregnant stomach. Dear god she was pregnant. _

_ Before her a crowd had gathered in front of what appeared to be a public execution. A shirtless man with long blonde hair kneeled on the ground in front of a man holding an axe. The man behind her spoke, his words long and eloquent, "Brother, you have committed the crime of dreams against me, the king. You have been sentenced to death."_

_ "Brother please…" the blonde spoke, his voice pleading._

_ "Slience! I have honored your last request by letting the woman you love go free," spoke the man behind her. "Now is the time for death."_

As the axe swung down on the neck of the blonde, she had woke up. That dream had worried her but not for the same reason. The fact that she was pregnant was a fact she definitely didn't want. The blonde also looked familiar, a hazy memory from her past. The man behind her…the voice had sounded as one she knew and yet again there was a difference to it.

Today was Friday, a day that she had looked forward to for a very long time. Today was the first date she had been on for a very long time. That morning though she would be spending time with Clint, something she looked forward to. Maybe Clint could fill her in on that day she last saw her father. She decided she didn't need to change into her clothes, pajamas were just fine for spending time with friends. She went into the living room, almost breathless as she saw the muscular blonde from the dream the night before. She closed the door to her room quietly as she listened to the conversation he and Clint were having, "So that's that? He escaped?"

"We haven't been able to find him," the blonde confirmed.

"You were supposed to keep a tab on him! We left him as your responsibility," Clint shouted, the look in his eyes one of minor terror but definite worry.

"I am most sorry my friend but-" The blonde looked from Clint's face to her own. "Who is this?"

"Same could be asked about you," Rebecca replied as she fully entered the room. There was a foggy familiarity to him and she had to know why. She stood next to Clint who mumbled something and went to get something to drink.

"I am Thor, King of Asgard. Clint did not tell me he had company," the blonde replied as he took her hand, kissing the top of it. Rebecca couldn't help but he reminded her of the behavior her date for the evening exhibited. The behavior was identical to this mans.

"Rebecca Coulson, agent of S-"

"Coulson? You are Rebecca, daughter of Phil?" Thor smiled, his eyes bright. He dropped the formalities and embraced her. A memory resignated in her mind after a shocked squeak resounded through her lips. She was a child, no more than seven who had been listening to a very adult conversation about a man who created death and something called the Chitauri. After the conversation, this man had found her spying but instead of growing angry, he swooped her up in his arms and took her to get food in the cafeteria.

Clint sat on the couch and spoke up, "Sorry to cut this short Rebecca but Thor has a very important task to be working on. He should get to it."

"Who went missing and why is it so important?" Rebecca asked as she pulled away from Thor, "Maybe my team can help. We need the field work."

"He's to dangerous," Clint informed, "You can't imagine how dangerous he really is."

"Give me a name," Rebecca responded, "I can help if I just have a name."

"Mayhaps she can help us Clint. We have aged and in our youth we could not handle him all alone. She is young and powerful as was her father," Thor backed Rebecca.

"I'm not sending her after that…that thing!" Clint growled, "Now c'mon, Thor, let's get to S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters to inform Maria."

"Yes, my brother must be brought to justice," Thor replied as he and Clint left the apartment. Rebecca caught that quip and her face nearly drained of color. The man who had laid his hands upon her pregnant stomach, the king to her queen, had been called brother by Thor in her dream. Whoever Clint was so worried had escaped and the brother and Thor had to be the same person. She just couldn't recall a name.

To make things worse she hadn't heard from her date about where they were going so she had no idea what to dress for. Making a decision on this sort of thing had never been her strong suit. Judging by his personality, Loki wouldn't be the sort of man who took her to some sleezy dive bar or some greasy hole in the wall resteraunt. No, he would pick some place elegant. Checking her watch, she realized how much time she had to spare and decided television was in order. She sat on the couch, flipping on the television and turning on her guilty pleasure show: Spongebob Squarepants. Even though she was a full grown adult, she still found the show to be funny, no matter how many times she'd seen the episode.

She stayed like that for the majority of the afternoon, getting up only to use the restroom and eat. She felt she had earned some lounging about time. When six rolled around, she got her dress clothes from her closet before retreating into the bathroom for a shower. Instead of a button up shirt and slacks, she had decided on a nice sweater and jeans. It was casual yet classy. She texted Loki the address before pacing the living room nervously.

It was no time before Rebecca heard a knock on the apartment door. Regaining her composure, she took a deep breath and opened it to show Loki on the other side. He looked handsome in his deep forest green button up and black slacks, leaning elegantly on his own cane. Rebecca adjusted her tight grip on her own cane before smiling, "Loki."

"Rebecca you look ravishing," Loki smiled as he stood outside of the apartment, "May I come in?"  
Rebecca smiled and let him in, appreciating his form as he passed her. She shut the door and gestured to the couch, "Have a sit?"

"I'm comfortable standing," Loki replied as he glanced at pictures on the shelf. He seemed to pale a bit when he picked up one of Natasha and Clint, "Friends of yours?"

"My roommate and his lady friend. He should be back soon if you want to meet him," Rebecca answered as she glanced at the photo from over his shoulder to see who he was talking about.

Loki put it back in its spot and shook his head, "That's quite alright. We must be off for supper anyways. After dinner I thought we could go dancing."

"You mean to a club?" Rebecca asked as she grabbed her purse.

"No, no not a club. Somewhere more refined. Mayhaps ball room dancing," Loki charmingly grinned.

"You know, you're the second person today whose used the word mayhaps. It's so…archaic," Rebecca thoughtfully smiled.

"Second? Who was the first?"

"A friend of mine, Thor."

Again Loki's face seemed to pale and he chuckled, "Quite humorous actually…that's my brother's name…"

Had Rebecca thought about it, she would have grown suspicious. Instead she smiled, "Small world." Taking hold of the doorknob she turned it and led Loki out into the hall.

A/N: So close to figuring it out and yet still so far, right ladies and gents? The next chapter will have mature themes, ye have been warned.


	13. I Believe In A Thing Called Love

XII: I Believe In A Thing Called Love

A/N: Song title taken from I Believe In A Thing Called Love by The Darkness. This chapter contains scenes of a sexual nature. Ye have been warned.

The car awaiting Rebecca and Loki out front was one of the nicest cars Rebecca had seen, and yet it wasn't a car Rebecca felt Loki usually drove. There sat a black Dodge Viper with bright green accents on the hood and doors. Rebecca hadn't pegged Loki as the muscle car type, "It's nice. So where are we going for dinner?" Rebecca questioned.

"Pelligrino's," Loki answered as he opened the passangers side doow for her, "I rather enjoy Italian food and Pelligrino's has the best steak that I've ever eaten. I thought afterwords we could attend a ballroom dancing event being held at the Hilton."

"Loki…I'm not sure I can dance…" Rebecca embarrisingly bit her lip, "I mean…my leg…"

"Your leg should not deter you from enjoying yourself," Loki frowned as he got into the drivers seat of the car, "If you mind then, we won't go."

"It's not really that I mind but…well…I don't want to be embarrassed of me," Rebecca sighed as she fidgeted with her cane.

"Rebecca, I could never be embarrassed of you," Loki chuckled as he drove, "your allowing me to escort you on a date for the evening. Most women your age would much rather be seen with a man who enjoys the music of will. or the television programs of Jersey Shore. Instead you chose to be with someone who enjoys classical music and books instead of television."

There was a slight hesitation but Rebecca finally spoke up, "How old are you?"

"Not to terribly much older than you if that's what you are asking," Loki smiled at her, "I'm only a few older than you."

A sigh of relief escaped Rebecca's lips and she sat comfortably in the car seat, "So books? What genre do you read the most?"

"I enjoy all sorts of literature. I much prefer the classics to the modern literature of today. I must say that the ones I enjoy the most are the epics of Arthur and his knights of the round table. I do sympathize with how Morganna felt. She was looked down on because she was a sorceress compared to her warrior brother. What are your favorite pieces of written work?"

"Well I like Hemmingway but as far as classics go…I really like Shakespeare," Rebecca confided in Loki.

"Your most liked of his works?" Loki questioned as they approached the resteraunt. Though it had been about thirty minutes in the car, the conversation had made the ride seem shorter.

"Hmm…Much Ado About Nothing," Rebecca decided, "I rather enjoy the concept of lovers being brought together by the lies of family and friends. Plus Kenneth Branaugh did a fantastic version where he played Benedick."

"Ah," Loki smiled fondly, parking the car at the curb for the valet to handle, "If we can do this, Cupid is no longer an archer: his glory shall be ours for we are the only love gods."

"My favorite Don Pedro line," Rebecca grinned as Loki helped her from the car. "I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be buried in thy eyes."

A soft smirk came to Loki's face as he opened the door for her, "I would have thought you to be a woman who enjoyed the wittier Shakespeare characters like Benedick but for that to be a line you know by heart shocks me."

Rebecca walked with him, smiling when one of his icy hands held hers. The host escorted them to their table by the front, Loki pulling out her chair before sitting down in his own. Menus were handed over to the duo and Rebecca spoke her mind, "Seeing the Dodge Viper you drove surprised me as well. It's definitely not a car I could see you driving before now."

"What can I say other than looks can be deceiving," Loki chuckled as he looked at the menu. For a moment that quote had sounded almost like a threat but as the man spoke again, Rebecca dismissed it. "Do you drink, Rebecca? I do rather enjoy a glass of Dom Perignon occasionally but if you wish for something else, so be it."

"That sounds nice," Rebecca smiled. There was an awkward pause before she apologized, "I'm sorry…it's just…I haven't had a date in a very long time…"

"It's quite alright," Loki pardoned as the waiter poured their wine. "Do you know that contrary to popular belief, most wines do not improve with age? That means, that like humans, a bottle of wine is finest in it's youth."

She understood that Loki was attempting to make conversation and Rebecca admired that. He was a fountain of information that seemed to be in every subject. "I bet upper class people feel silly when they find this out."

Loki laughed, "I suppose that they do. I've never been much of a collector, even in my youth. I never collected wine nor anything else."

"I did when I was younger and my dad was still alive," Rebecca smiled as she produced her wallet from her pocket, showing off the Captain America collectors cards she and her father had been so proud of. "My dad and I were fond of Captain America. Most of these he found before I was around but a few of them were gathered by the both of us."

"I never put much stock in heroes in my youth," Loki replied with a small smile as he looked at the cards briefly before looking at his menu, "I do believe I know what I want to eat. Have you made your decision?"

"I think I'm gonna try the spaghetti pelligrino with shrimp," Rebecca smiled, folding her menu and handing it to the waiter, "What about you?"

Loki folded his menu and handed it over, "The sautéed steak. An order of breadsticks for the both of us." The waiter left the table and Loki asked, "What sort of music do you enoy?"

"I like it all but rock's my favorite. Classic rock especially," Rebecca smiled, "I was raised on Ac/Dc and the like."

"I have never enjoyed much rock," Loki replied, "however, I am certain I could make a reason too."

Sipping her wine, Rebecca blushed a bit. He knew what to say to charm her, that was evident. He was silver tongued, a charmer. "So what do you do for fun?"

"Read, listen to music. I enjoy learning different things, no matter what they might be. That's what brought me here," Loki answered.

"To America you mean?" Rebecca raised an eyebrow.

The corners of his lips lifted in the faintest smile, "Yes, to America. I always thought what my brother spoke of here , it's unrealized beauty, was some lie he told until I met you Rebecca Coulson."

Rebecca polished off her glass of wine before looking away, "I'm…I'm not that great. I have inner demons, personal baggage and problems. Sometimes I think I have more than the average woman…"

"All people have problems Rebecca. It is merely how we tame them, how we decide to display them that makes a hero or villain," Loki advised.

"How are you so smart and yet so young?" Rebecca questioned as their supper was brough to them and a second glass of wine poured.

"Leave the bottle," Loki smiled at the waiter who listened. Looking back at Rebecca, there seemed to be a flash of pain behind his eyes before he spoke, "Alas, that is a bit of my baggage."

Rebecca nodded to show that she understood he didn't feel the need to speak on it before tasting the meal that had been brought before her. Making a sound of approval, she politely patted the corner of her nouth with her napkin, "This meal is delicious!"  
"I am most glad you enjoy it," Loki replied as he looked at her fondly. He reached over with a hand, touching her cheek and ever so delicately with his thumb whipping away a bit of lingering sauce. Though his hand was still ice cold, the act was enough to send sparks to her heart. "I do apologize but you had-"

"Don't apologize," Rebecca chuckled, though it was more to calm her own nerves. She took a sip of wine and pushed her food around with her fork, "I…I don't mind…"

"I did not overstep boundaries?" he asked, sinking a bite of his own meal between his thin lips.

"No," was the simple reply.

"Good," Loki smiled as he continued with his own delicious meal.

Though there was little talk between the two during the meal, Rebecca felt closer to Loki than she had felt connected to anyone since the fated night she spent with Troy Burton. She felt as if there was a real bond between the two and as they made their way to the car hand in hand after supper, Rebecca was unsure of what that bond was. Part of her was saying to allow herself time before she did anything stupid but a larger half had drank five glasses of extremely powerful wine and was telling her to do something stupid.

As they got in the car, Rebecca turned to him, "Let's go to my place."

"Miss Coulson, are you quite alright?" Loki asked, slightly amused by her drunken state.

"Had a bit much to drink," Rebecca chuckled, "Let's go to my place. We don't have to if you don't want to but I can't dance in this state."

"Even compromise, we dance a few dances at your home," Loki smiled as they rode together, "I will support you during the dance."

Rebecca nodded, "I'd like that…I'd like that a lot…"

Loki smiled, "I don't have to worry about the roommate do I?"

"Clint won't be home 'til late. He probably went out for drinks with Tasha," Rebecca smiled as she kicked off her heels in the car. "You'll be fiiine."

Loki chuckled and nodded, the car falling silent except for the musical tones playing beautifully over the radio. Though it wasn't rock or classic rock, Rebecca found the music as emotion filled as one of those songs. She glanced over at Loki, taking in how he appeared in the darkness of the car Pale, as if he had never seen the sun, with two glimmering green eyes that seemed to radiate the life he had led with a few unknown horrors behind them, perfect lips that she wanted to claim with her own.

The very thought of her cohort for the evening kissing and touching her skin brought shivers down Rebecca's spine. She bit her lip and forced her attentions and thoughts elsewhere. "Lovely night, isn't it?" Loki spoke in a soft tone, "The loveliness of fall can hold its own until the beauty of winter strikes."

"So…poetic," Rebecca smield as the car pulled up outside her apartment building.

"That doesn't answer what you think about the weather," Loki chuckled as he helped her out of the car. He walked her inside and Rebecca led him into her room, "I know it's not much but…but it's mine…"

"It's lovely," Loki confirmed as he stood in front of the radio. His hands fiddled with the station knob, finally resting on what must have been the classical station. A slow tune played and he turned to her, taking one of her hands in his own. It was an old fashioned position, their fingers laced together and his hand on her hip. They smiled as one another, "Ready?"

"With you sure," Rebecca replied softly. She stumbled a bit at first, the movements strange. Their bodies were pressed together, Loki leading her in a slow waltz across the bedroom floor. Their eyes met, Loki's green and her own brown, before she pulled him in for a searing kiss. She was afraid that when he let go of her hand, Loki would hate her for what she had done. She was not expecting his arm to wrap around her waist to press her closer to him.

Loki sat on her bed, Rebecca straddling his hips. She felt his hands threading themselves through her hair, her own hands pressed to his chest. "My word Rebecca…" Loki breathed, their eyes both gleaming as they gazed at one another. There was heat between the two of them, natural tension.

"I can…I can stop if you want…" Rebecca panted, licking her lower lip. There was a part of her that did not want to sleep, that wanted to be Loki's lover. The other part of her told her this was wrong, that she didn't want to allow herself to be touched by his cold hand.

"No…gods no…" Loki replied as once again their lips claimed each other. Fervidly, hands caressed each other's skins as clothing was removed, tossed across the room. Loki's thin body lay under hers, muscles rippling beneath his satin like skin. The curves of their bodies pressed perfectly against one another and the love making was just right. He was not to rough with her nor was he to soft. He gently kissed and caressed each inch of skin, to feel splendid. Though it was not love, it was close to it and afterwords they lay in each other's arms, Rebecca's head on Loki's chest as the night progressed.

The morning, as morning's usually do, came too soon and the sunlight beamed in through the window. Rebecca's eyes fluttered open, a fog like hangover cursing her. She realized he was gone. Part of her felt foolish. She should have known what would happen. She dressed in a pair of shorts and a tank top, exiting the room to see a baffling sight.

Clint had a bow with an arrow raised and pointed at the man she had laid with the night before. He recognized Rebecca out of the corner of his eye and spoke, "Becky, you have some explaining to do."

A/N: Sorry to leave you with a cliffhanger but I do love them so. I noticed a few things about this chapter I wanted to point out. Pelligrino's is a real resteraunt in New York City. The conversation about books includes Morganna (who I rp as on a board who loves a friend's Loki character). It also involves mention of Branaugh, Kenneth Branaugh, who directed Thor as well as staring in a movie version of Much Ado About Nothing. Much Ado About Nothing, coincidentally, is the newest Joss Whedon movie which has Clark Gregg in it. Check out the trailer, it's good.


	14. We All Lose Our Charms

XIII: We All Lose Our Charms In The End

A/N: The lyric is taken from Diamonds Are A Girls Best Friend originally by Carol Channing. I prefer the Marilyn Monroe version myself.

"Clint what are you doing!?" Rebecca shouted at the sight in front of her. Her roommate and good friend was staring down the man who had been her bed partner just the night before with an arrow pointed in the man's face. She was confused by the venom and hatred in Clint's eyes. "Dear god Clint! When you said you'd put an arrow through my psychologists eye socket, I didn't think you were serious!"

Clint made no attempt to lower his arrow but laughed bitterly, "Your psychologist?! Becs, I don't…you honestly don't know who this man is do you?"

"If we could all stop shouting…"

"Oh you'd like that you slimy little bastard!" Clint sneered, "Go on, tell your 'patient' who you are! Tell her what you've done!"

"My name is Loki Laufeyson-"

"Liar! Tell her the truth!" demanded Clint with a growl.

With a reproachful look, Loki responded, "I am Loki, son of Laufey. I am the God of Mischief, trickery, and lies."

"So he's the god of mischief, so what? I'm sure that's not reason to threaten him this early in the morning!" Rebecca gestured to Clint, "Lower your bow!"

"Tell her Loki. Tell her what she's deserved to know and would have known if you told her the truth!" Clint ordered menacingly. She had never seen her friend like this, not even when she had been a child.

"I knew…I knew your father," Loki started.

"Go on."

"I…it was by my hand your father died," Loki confessed.

At first she laughed. He wasn't old enough to have killed her father. He was only a few years older than her after all. But then as they stared at each other, a small memory invaded her mind. She was a child, standing behind her father and looking on as armed S.H.I.E.L.D guards led a man, Loki, down the hall. Their eyes had met on that day as well. Suddenly she knew. This man, no, monster was the reason her childhood had changed. "You bastard!" Rebecca screamed, hand hitting him across the face hard enough to snap his head to the side. "You sniveling coward! I trust you since the moment we met! I confided dreams and nightmares to you! You…you lied and hid everything from me!"

"Rebecca if you would let me explain…" Loki started.

"You…you don't have to explain," Rebecca shook her head.

"So can I finish my decision to shoot the bastard?" Clint growled, his knuckles on the hand that gripped the bow turned white.

"Tell the girl your part in all of this Barton," Loki spoke plainly, a gaze at Clint making the other man falter on his grip. "None of our hands are free of red, our ledgers are all well marked with red ink."

"Clint's a saint!" Rebecca snapped, "He gave me a place to go after I got back to the states!"  
"A saint? More blood is on his hands than you would ever guess. He is part of the reason your father is dead," Loki smirked.

There was a slight hesitation but when Clint lowered his bow completely, Rebecca knew something was wrong. "Clint…what's he-"

"You saw me that day, the day of the explosion. I…I was under his magic, my brain was his puppet. But I sort of remember seeing you. You ran towards me, wanted to see me. But your father stopped you," Clint stammered, "I was the one who caused the expolosion…"

She remembered that to. Her father had put a hand over her mouth, had made her promise that she wouldn't go near anyone else. Backing away from Clint, her back hit the wall. "You…how much more did you lie to me about?"

"Tell her your S.H.I.E.L.D codename archer. Tell her everything you hid from her," Loki snickered. Though he was still the same handsome man who had bedded her the night before, there was a terrifying undertone to him. The deranged mind had held beauty but now she knew it also contained a monster.

"In another life I was known as Hawkeye and I was a member of a team called-"

"The Avengers," Rebecca realized, "Tony was Iron Man, Steve was Captain America. Your Hawkeye, that means…"

"The woman he loves was the spider," Loki offered.

"That means Tasha was the Black Widow," Rebecca blinked, "and…and Thor was of course Thor. That leaves the big green guy…" she thought about it, flashes of her childhood zooming through her brain. If everyone else she knew was an Avenger that left, "Bruce."

"We didn't tell you out of respect for your dad," Clint confirmed. "It kept you safe."

"A load of good it did her," gestured Loki at Rebecca's knee, "That injury was sustained after she left Iraq which had been the recommendation of her precious soldier."

"You were there…" Rebecca gestured with her hand in his direction with an accusatory finger, "The day the injury happened. I saw you before I passed out. What…what were you…"

Loki brought his hand up and time seemed to stand still. Clint was frozen as if he was a statue. Even the hand on the clock stood still, "Rebecca, how else was I supposed to talk to you?"

"You injured me…you made me a cripple…all to meet me? Why?" Rebecca asked, feeling like a piece of meat as he circled her.

"I never meant for damage to befall you. In all actuality, you should have been left uninjured," Loki answered as he stood in front of her yet again. "As for why, that is another mystery. It is one I cannot divulge. Believe me when I say I would never allow danger to befall you."

"You were the monster who killed my father," Rebecca shook her head, "I can never trust you. I spilled my heart to you. I…I let you closer than I'd ever let anyone…."

Loki cupped her cheek, "You are the only mortal I care fo. The only woman I have ever truly loved."

"You're a god of lies, a murderer who killed the father and claimed the daughter," she promised, "Whatever dirty scheme you have up your sleeve…I'll stop it."

"That sounds like a test or challenge," Loki chuckled, "I accept. I will see you soon Rebecca Coulson. Parting is such sweet sorrow."

With another wave of his hand he was both gone and time had resumed. Clint blinked and looked at her, as if he was a child ashamed to be scolded. "Becs I…"

Rebecca ignored him, wanting to make her own claim, "You need to gather the old Avengers. Last time a S.H.I.E.L.D agent worked to protect this world from Loki, he gave his life for the lot of you. If you bring the heroes, I'll bring even more agents."


	15. The People You'll Never Get The Best Of

XIV: We Are The People That You'll Never Get The Best Of

A/N: Song lyrics taken from Are We All We Are by Pink.

There was a quote from Marilyn Monroe, " No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth." While it was true, it didn't clear up the doubt and misgivings she had in her own brain. How had she been so stupid? All the clues had been in front of her, she had just failed to put it all together. Rebecca had felt stupid enough to fall for Loki's tricks, charms, and sweet talk. Even worse, she had felt that she and Loki were going to fall in love. God knows she already was.

Doubt and feat had to be put out of her mind. Rebecca was going to stop him, to make sure he never killed anyone ever again. There were two teams to get together: the old Avengers and her own team of S.H.I.E.L.D agents. She was slightly worried about both. All of the Avengers heroes, save for maybe Clint and Natasha, had aged considerably. Asking them to go to the front line could kill some of them. Then there was the opposite end of the spectrum: her own team was a bunch of rookies. In their training exercises, Rebecca always lost a team member. These were just team exercises in a safe room. If they were to go in the field against a man who could be so dangerous as to kill, one or all of them would die.

She changed into something more take charge, making sure to leave the color green out of her wardrobe and making a mental note to rid her wardrobe of all green later. Her black suit firmly pressed, Rebecca drove to S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters. She had not made a team meeting but she still found each of her teammates. Alec had been on his laptop in his room, talking about the latest Dr. Who episode with some friends in a chatroom. Emily and Josh had been training and to her surprise, Jana and Luke had been cuddling in Jana's room. They gathered in a nearby conference room, the Avengers team already inside. "We have a problem," Rebecca started.

"Yes we do, it's to early to be here," grumbled Luke.

"You need to learn a thing or two about going on missions," Steve spoke as he looked over at the young man, "Missions aren't going to wait for you to be well rested. They come at all hours of the night and day."

"Listen gramps I was-"

"Did you just call him gramps? Luke do you know who that is?!" Jana asked, shocked.

"Cut it out, both of you. Luke, Cap'ns right. Missions can come around at all hours of the day. Cap'n, no need to be snippy."

"Why are we here, it's so early!" Emily whined, pouting.

Indeed it was early but that didn't affect Rebecca, "This morning I found out that the man I'm in love with was actually the man who killed my father, Phil. For weeks I had been manipulated by Loki. He's up to something. Last time, he took the life of a S.H.I.E.L.D agent. This time, he won't get so lucky. I chose you all for two reasons. My team is who I trust but you all are the Avengers. You stopped him last time…"

"Last time was sixteen years ago," Bruce spoke up from his place in the corner of the room, "we aren't in the shape to fight him like we were back then and some of us are no longer heroes."

"Bruce is right, Becky," Tony nodded, "I can't get out there again. The last time we fought Loki…I almost died…"

"And we're not experienced enough to go in against Loki," Alec replied as he pushed up his glasses, "We'd get ourselves or someone else killed."

"That's what's bugging me," Rebecca confided, "the team that once took down Loki is old and the new team, my team, is too inexperienced to fight him."

"There is something we could do," Natasha spoke up, causing everyone to stare at her where she sat at the front of the room. "Well there is…"

"What's that Tash?" Clint asked, always willing to listen to whatever Natasha had to say.

"Yes, Widow, what is thy plan?" Thor asked, leaning back in his seat.

"We all train heroes," Natasha quipped as if it was obvious, "each of us pick the hero who we believe to be the most qualified."

"Wait, then where do we fit in?" Luke asked, slightly peeved. "We're her team, we should be the ones out there in the field with her."

"Didn't you listen to a word Alec said?" Rebecca rolled her eyes, "You guys would get walloped, maybe even killed."

"Walloped? Been hanging around Steve too much, Becky?" snickered Tony.

Steve rolled his eyes at Tony before giving Natasha a kind smile, "Natasha, that's a good idea."

"It is," Rebecca agreed, "Jana, Alec, you're guys skills can be utilized from the base. Jana, your language skills aren't much good in a fight, even though you are. Alec.."

"I much prefer computer conversation to human interaction," Alec raised his hand to cut her off, knowing that he didn't have many skills with a gun.

"And you're right about me," nodded Jana, "I may be able to fight but my language skills are more in tune."

"What about me, Josh, and Em though?" Luke asked, "Our skills are best for the field."

"I can make bombs for her and whoever needs em," Emily offered, "Being a S.H.I.E.L.D agent isn't about saving the world so much as it's about making sure that we back up the heroes."

Luke ran a hand through his hair, "What about me and-"

Then something happened that neither Rebecca nor Emily nor anyone else in the room who knew him expected. Josh put a hand on Luke's shoulder and spoke, "Enough."

Rebecca's eyes went wide and she gazed at Josh before glancing at Emily, "He can talk. You said…"

"Josh hasn't spoken a word since we were kids," Emily remarked, eyes just as wide.

"I expected a deeper voice, something more menacing," Luke grinned.

"Not a mute. I took a vow of silence when we were younger," Josh spoke again, glancing at his sister kindly, "I had no reason to talk because you knew everything. You were always a caring and empathic person, wanting to take care of me like you were the older sibling. Now…well…Luke needs to hear the reason and logic from someone who he might listen to."

"As much as I hate to break up what I'm sure is a touching moment…well…we need to figure out how we're going to combat Loki," Tony spoke up.

"Fine, so what are me and Josh supposed to do?" Luke sighed.

"We help Becca," Josh spoke, "we help her get as trained as we are in the fields."

"What do you mean? She's not going in the field either," Steve spoke as if his word was law.

"Actually…I am," Rebecca calmly spoke, "Loki killed my dad. I deserve revenge."

"Revenge never works out for those who seek it," Thor spoke.

"No offense, Thor, but it was my-"

"Father who gave up his life, I remember. My own brother locked me in a containment room and forced me to watch him murder Phil, Son of Coul, before he sent me on my merry way," Thor spoke, his voice low.

"As terrible as it sounds…I'm with the kid," Clint replied, breaking the silence that had befallen Rebecca after listening to Thor's statement. "She's got every right to be in the field, especially against Loki."

"She's…she can't…"

"Because I'm a cripple?" Rebecca interrupted Steve, "Unless I'm mistaken weren't you scrawny and weak when you were picked for the super soldier program? There's no difference here. I can still preform, my team can vouch for that."

"She has a point," Clint spoke, "I'm behind here. You let me fight alongside you after I was emotionally compromised. I'm proof it works."

"If Clint believes in her, so do I," Natasha backed him up. Rebecca swore that the smile that came to Clint's face was one of how he really felt about Natasha but she wouldn't say anything to embarrass him.

"I…I don't have much of a choice. She'll nag until then," chuckled Tony, "We raised her to be a hero, to do the right thing. To her, this is the right thing."

Rebecca remembered the dream she had a while back about her father. She had promised to do the right thing. A moment of doubt made her bite her lip. What if Steve was right and revenge wasn't the right thing to do? If that was true, she was dishonoring her father's memory. Shaking her head to clear away those thoughts, she plastered a smile on her face. "So who alls in?"

"I can help fight my brother, no matter my age," Thor nodded at her.

"He broke your heart and you're like the little sister I never had, I'm in," Clint grinned, "I'm not too old to kick some ass."

"If Clint's not to old, I'm not to old. I'm only a year older than him," Natasha smirked.

"We'll do whatever you need of us," Josh smiled, gesturing at the team of S.H.I.E.L.D agents who fell in behind him, smiles on their faces.

"Pepper would kill me if I got out in the field again. I'll stay behind with your tech, give one of my brighter pupils to you guys for your techno teammate." Tony smiled.

"I haven't gone into…that form…in years but I have trained a few kids who can help," Bruce replied with a pained look, "I've got the perfect teammate in mind."

Steve sat there for a moment, rubbing his temples, "Becs…are you really not gonna change your mind?"

"Not for anything." Rebecca grinned.

"Stubborn," he chuckled, "but fine, fine. Come with me."

Rebecca followed Steve into the hall, past several doors, until they arrived in a room with suits from each of the original heroes from The Avengers. She assumed there were copies since she had seen the original Hawkeye costume on Clint. "It's nice but I don't need to see copies of these costumes." Rebecca spoke solemnly.

Steve chuckled as he opened the case where his costume sat, "Not copies. We stared the costumes from our first mission in here." He took the shield that bore his symbol from the placed that is hung and grinned, "If you're going to be leading the new team, you'll need this."

"But this…this is your shield," Rebecca marveled at it. The weight of it in her hands was heavy but she was able to wield it with ease, "…I…I couldn't…"

"You could and you will," Steve spoke. "Your father idolized me but…well…he was my hero for what he did that day. I consider this helping to get revenge on the man who cut his life short. I never did get to sign those cards…"

There was a pause in which a few tears slipped down her cheeks and she threw her arms around Steve's neck. Those words, which would have meant the world to her father, meant the world to her. The giving of the shield was a symbolic moment, a passing of the torch. The new team, the New Avengers, were now officially hers to lead.

A/N: To those who have kept up with it, thanks. I'd love to see reviews so I can know what you hope to see and what you think so far!


	16. Technologic

XV: Technologic

A/N: Song title taken from Technologic by Daft Punk.

Rebecca had grown up with bizarre technology since the age of seven. The more different Tony could make an invention, the happier he was. Even with that, Rebecca had never quite seen a room like this. Different toy planes zoomed around the ceiling while computers were set up around the room, set to different websites. One was on Netflix, watching episdoes of My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic while another was on some art website. "Tony," Rebecca started as they walked through the room, "you know my policy on kids in the field, I'm not taking a ten year old girl with me."

Tony held back a laugh, looking at Rebecca from the corner of his eyes, "First of all they aren't a ten year old or even a kid."

"More importantly though, 'she' is a he," came the response from a voice in the darkness of the room. The lights flicked on, a young man sitting on a bed in the room. An X-Box 360 controller was in his hands as Skyrim played on a nearby flat screen television. He was most definitely a he, maybe the same age or a littler younger than she was. Instead of looking like the geek she expected, he was tall and buff, as if he was a body builder on the side. His black hair was cut in a buzz cut and he wore a muscle shirt with the Nike logo on it and blue jeans. "Who's she Tony?"

"Damien, this is Rebecca Coulson. Becky this is Damien Rhodes," Tony introduced as he looked around the room. Every so often he would pick out a half-finished piece of equipment and tinker with it before going on to the next, making silent notes on how he felt about the piece of work.

"Rhodes?" Rebecca grinned, her grin turning into laughter. "Oh god this is rich, you're the Rhodes boy! I met you once or twice growing up when you're daddy came to visit."

Rebecca remembered the occasional visits from Rhodey, as Tony called him, and his son. They had never been close, Damien and Rebecca, since Rebecca tended to spend most of her time alone in her room. It seemed as she grew up, the visits became less and less frequent. "Rebecca," Damien nodded before turning to Tony, "can you not touch things? I'm working."

Tony put the thing he was looking down at, a sort of ear com link that looked familiar to the ones that Rebecca and her team had been wearing in her dream where she was staring down Stark Enterprises, back on the desk and looked over at Damien who was still playing Skyrim, "We could really use your help Damien."

"What piece of technology did you screw up on this time? Or does J.A.R.V.I.S just need a new upgrade," Damien playfully asked, turning toward the computer screen that was on Netflix playing My Little Pony. With a blink of his eye, he changed the option to play an old Chuck Norris movie instead.

"Woah, what was that!?" Rebecca asked, having never seen such a thing. Though she acted as if she had seen things of a heroic nature, most heroics were actually new to her.

"You ain't never seen a technopath before?" Damien asked, grinning. He stood, towering over Rebecca which meant he was at least 6'4 to be that much taller than her.

"Technopath?" she asked, confused.

"We're like telepath's only our powers work on electronics, not the human brain. I've been able to do this ever since I can remember," Damien smiled as he tinkered with a small steampunk looking bird. He tweaked a button on its wing and the bird began to chip and fly around the room with the planes. "Dad wanted me to get the help I needed so he did everything he could to help."

"But how do you get those sorts of powers when your dad didn't?" Rebecca asked, "Freak accident or something?"

When Damien looked slightly annoyed, Tony spoke up, "Sometimes powers just happen. No one knows why genes mutate."

Rebecca nodded, "I see. So you control technology?"

"I can interface with it, use my mind to work with it," Damien nodded, "When dad retired to Miami with my mom a few years ago, he even left me the suit."

"So you are War Machine now?" Rebecca inquired.

"Changed the name to Cytron but it's the same suit and principal. Now what do you guys want? I was in the middle of Skyrim." Damien asked as he started to tinker on the communicator again.

"We need your help, S.H.I.E.L.D needs your help," Rebecca spoke, her role as agent taking over.

"S.H.I.E.L.D needs my help? With what? Usually Maria Hill just yells at me to stay out of the important files when I hack in. She use to yell at me for hacking in but she knew I was never gonna quit," Damien chuckled as he turned to look at them. Seeing the looks on both of their faces, Damien's brow furrowed, "You really aren't kidding. What does S.H.I.E.L.D need me for?"

"Well…it's Loki, he's back," Rebecca cooly responded, not letting it get the best of her.

"Loki…you mean…" Damien glanced from the ever calm Rebecca to Tony who was playing with the bird and trying his best not to think about the past. "You do mean he's back. It's not a joke. Why me though? I'm okay, fought a couple of lesser known villains but Loki is the big time."

"I can't fight Loki. Back when we took him down the first time, I was a younger man who wasn't a husband or father and nearly died for his team. At this age, I would die," Tony confessed his fears. "I have a lot of young men and women I've trained but you, Damien, are the only one I know won't get himself killed."

Damien looked at Rebecca, "Lemme guess, you're like the new Nick Fury or something?"

"No sir, I'm you're team leader," Rebecca grinned.

"Wait, you're the leader?" Damien lifted an eyebrow in a curious manner.

"Just because I don't look like much doesn't mean I am nothing much. I'm a highly decorated military officer for the United States Army. Not to mention I'm a talented S.H.I.E.L.D agent. Loki took my father from me when I was a child. I swore to stop him."

Damien nodded, "I'll join you. I guess Skyrim can wait."

Rebecca held out a hand, smiling at Damien shook it. One new member down, she had to meet the hero Bruce had chosen to join the team in his stead later on. If her or she was anything like Damien, Rebecca believed they would get along just fine.

A/N: Sorry the chapter is short, the next one will be too since we're setting up the team. I promise I have in mind what Loki's plan is. You'll just have to wait to see it.


	17. You're From A Whole 'Nother World

**XVI: You're From A Whole 'Nother World**

**A/N: Song lyrics taken from Extraterrestrial by Katy Perry. I feel the need to clear up the fact that the last chapters, since We All Lose Our Charms, take place during the length of the entire day.**

If Rebecca had gone to college, she expected that the apartment that she was in at the moment in Brooklyn would have been what her own apartment would have looked like. Pictures of a young woman and her friends hung on the walls while the room itself was cluttered with clothes and text books. Rebecca could easily see why this girl was studying under Bruce, all of her text books were science related. "I though you said she would be here," Rebecca replied as she sat on the black sofa which she supposed folded out into a bed.

"She's going to meet us here is what I said. You drove us to her apartment to 'make sure she wasn't hiding'," Bruce replied as she sat down beside her.

"Look I know that's not what a good agent would-"

"Are you kidding me Becca? Your dad and Fury would have done the exact same thing," Bruce laughed as he sat back in the couch as the door opened. A woman of no more than twenty entered the room, dressed in what seemed to be a volleyball uniform.

"Bruce…who is this and why are the two of you in my apartment? I though I locked the door before I left," the girl spoke, wrinkling her brow. She put the ball she was holding on the floor before turning back to look at Bruce and Rebecca.

"Acrah," Bruce smiled as he stood, embracing the girl as if embracing a daughter, "this is Rebecca Coulson. She works with me at-"

"S.H.I.E.L.D…" frowned Acrah, which Becca found to be an odd name. She looked over Rebecca and then looked to Bruce, "You promised not to tell them about me…you promised…"

"Acrah these are bad times for everyone. Or at least they will be," Rebecca stated, hoping to stop the girl from hating her presence. She didn't know why but there was something different about her.

"No, these are bad times for S.H.I.E.L.D," Acrah shook her head, "Bruce told me when I was training that S.H.I.E.L.D was confused by people like me. How can I fully trust an organization that doesn't understand or trust me?"

Giving Bruce a stern look, Rebecca focused back on the girl Arcah. There was something about her that was different, Rebecca just couldn't quite put her finger on it. "S.H.I.E.L.D doesn't look down on science wiz's. So you're a geek, so what? We've got two of those already. If your super brilliant, we can work with that well."

Acrah looked between Bruce and Rebecca, a smile on her fact that spoke more than she did of her amusement and slight humor, "She has no idea, does she?"

"She hasn't worked with S.H.I.E.L.D nor have I told her about what you can do," Bruce smiled at the girl, "See Ace, I didn't tell her so there was no need to accuse her for being like some of the other agents."

Rebecca felt like a child being kept in the dark about a present they were going to be presented with. The truth was she was being kept in the dark, there was certainly something she didn't know. "So she's got powers? What, like being able to shoot beams or-"

"Watch," Acrah smiled, her eyes filled with a twinkling mischief. In a few seconds, he appearance had gone from human to something vaguely resembling a human. Her ears had elongated into points that reached the top of her head. Her jaw was more square than should be, thinner fingers on her hands which had what appeared to be claws instead of nails. The skin covering her body had gone from the flesh tones of human beings to being a forest green. All around it reminded Rebecca of a goblin from a fairy tail or even an alien.

Rebecca took a breath to calm herself but her statement still came out rushed "What in Gods green Earth are you?"

Acrah laughed, revealing teeth that were longer and sharper than most creatures, "Nothing on God's green Earth. The proper term for my kind is Skrull."

"Skrull? I've never heard of them before. You're an alien?" Rebecca asked, a bit more relaxed. In the last few hours she had seen two gods and a man who controlled electronics with his mind. Somehow the idea of alien life neither scared her nor did it worry her.

"Technically. My mum and dad were Skrull so I'm a born Skrull but I was born in Nevada. Mom and dad left when I was eleven. Bruce mad sure I had a home with Betsy Ross and her dad. I realized I could shapeshift when I was thirteen," Acrah laughed, "So I was bourn here but I'm an alien species."

"We really could use your help at S.H.I.E.L.D. Loki's back and he's plotting," Rebecca spoke, having finally regained her wits.

"Just like a typical agent," Acrah rolled her eyes as she shifted back into her human form. "You want me to help with a fight I have no business in."

"Ace, if Loki takes over the world…well…it will be your battle," Bruce replied, "Loki wants total domination. He's not like Abomination and just wants revenge. He wants total control of everything and everyone."

"When that time comes, I'll deal with it. I have a life. I'm a volleyball player who happens to be one of the best college accepted players in the States. I'm engaged to a wonderful guy who doesn't care if I'm an alien. The last thing I need is for my average life to go to hell in a hand basket because S.H.I.E.L.D got involved. You told me yourself Bruce, before S.H.I.E.L.D pulled you into the mess with Loki, you enjoyed living a semi-normal life."

A waiver of doubt flickered across Rebecca's mind. Would her life had been normal if her father hadn't of died? Would she have been a college girl who would marry a sweet boy instead of winding up what she was, a disabled veteran who had been used for the start of some evil scheme by a malicious murdering madman? Blinking her eyes, Rebecca let go of any doubt. Like it or not, fate had led her down this road. "Volleyball, eh? How about we cut a deal," Rebecca began to bargin.

"I'm listening," started Acrah.

"Me and you play a game of one on one. If I score on you, you join the team," Rebecca grinned. The grin was more to boost her own confidence. She hadn't played volleyball since high school.

"And if I win?" Acrah asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"S.H.I.E.L.D leaves you alone," Rebecca promised.

Acrah grinned, "Any rules you wanna make before we get to this? I mean, any rules you wanna make due to the fact I've got a couple advantages?"

"No powers," Rebecca supplied.

"Sounds good to me. You gonna wanna play at a park or can we play rooftop?" Acrah smiled as she grabbed the ball from the floor.

"Rooftop sounds just fine," Rebecca agreed as they, the two girls and Bruce, headed to the rooftop. A makeshift net was stretched across the width of the roof, leading Rebecca to believe that Acrah enjoyed coming up here for games. She took in the perimeters of the field, knowing that causing an out of bounds point would be the best for her.

"Ready?" Acrah asked, grin across her face.

"Whenever you are," Rebecca nodded. The first serve came whistling through the air, Rebecca tossing her care aside to dive to one knee for the ball. She managed to bump the ball across the other side, Acrah going for it as well. The game went on for what seemed like hours, until Rebecca saw her move. She bumped the ball into the air, Acrah running out for it, and the ball bouncing on the line.

"The point counts," Bruce grinned, crossing his arms over the chest as he examined it.

Acrah looked stunned for a moment before a curt gin crossed over her lips, "You won Agent, I'm a member of S.H.I.E.L.D now."

"Not S.H.I.E.L.D," Rebecca grinned, "You're an Avenger now. And my names not Agent, it's Rebecca Coulson."

A/N: Well now the whole team is together! The first part of Loki's plan will be involved in the next chapter or so, maybe even totally revealed.


	18. Once Upon A Dream

XVII: Once Upon A Dream

A/N: Song title taken from the Disney song Once Upon A Dream from Sleeping Beauty. There is mention of adult acts but no actual act.

The day had been full of excitement. She had brought together a team to combat whatever Loki had been planning. The thought that he had gotten so close to her without her realizing that he was the coward who had killed her father shook Rebecca and was the thought she had gone to sleep with.

Maybe that was the reason she had the dream she did or maybe it was the god of mischief invading her dreams themselves.

_She felt awake, finding herself in a throne room that was like the one she had seen in the dream where she had crowned Loki. In fact, it would have been an exact replica except for the fact that it was made of ice. Though it was ice, the room was not cold. Realizing that fact may have been the black fur mantle she wore, Rebecca checked for any sign of the place she was._

_ "My place in Jotunheim," came a voice from behind her._

_ Rebecca turned, stone faced. She swore the voice had been that of Loki's but the creature in front of her was not Loki. It's skin was ice blue, the same black hair as Loki's but the eyes were amber brown. "Wh…what are you?"_

_ "You really must have a conversation with my idiot brother about me dear Rebecca," the creature laughed, shifting into the murdered she knew and had once thought she loved. Standing before her, smirking at her as if she had spoken a funny joke, was Loki._

_ "What do __**you**__ want?" asked Rebecca with a snarl._

_ "To speak to you Rebecca," Loki replied with a soft look on his face. He took a step towards her, Rebecca then took a step back. Again there was a step towards her and again she took a step back. She stumbled, falling into the ice throne. "You fear me?"_

_ "You killed my dad! You used me for god only knows what!" Rebecca shouted, gripping the arm of the throne until he knuckles turned white. "I will never forgive you for what you did to me, to my family!"_

_ "You could have it all and more Rebecca," offered Loki, standing to the right of her. He waved his hand and there was a bright flash of light. Where there had been nothing, stood the two people she hoped she would see in her waking moments._

_ "Mom…dad…" Rebecca whispered as she rose from the throne._

_ Phil Coulson, his arm around his wife Viola's shoulders protectively, stood in the center of the room. He did not seem like a parlor trick or vision, nor did her mother. Both were there, in the flesh, staring at Rebecca quite afraid. "Becca? Becca honey is that you?" Viola asked._

_ Rebecca rushed to them, running straight into what felt like an invisible wall. She turned, glaring at Loki, "What sort of magic is this?"_

_ "A barrier but the appearance of your mother and father is due to my daughter, Hel, she runs the underworld," Loki smiled, "You share many things with your mother. But that spirit, that passion, that is what your father left to you. I know your past, you never had a real home. I can give you that."_

_ "At what price?" Rebecca asked. She would never give in to Loki but there was a small part of her that wondered. What was having a mother like? Would she have met the people she knew and ended up the way she was now?_

_ "Don't listen to that monster-"_

_ "SILENCE!" Loki screamed, his eyes cold as he gazed at Phil. He took a deep, calming breath before looking at Rebecca. "I do not wish for you to be a lowly pawn. You could stand by my side as my queen, my equal. I will offer you your family in return for the cooperation in my plan. With you by my side, we will destroy those who oppose you."_

_ "No one opposes me," Rebecca shook her head but that was all she had to say on the matter. Her hand was pressed against the wall, staring at her mother and father. Phil's hand was on hers, a strong look on his face though tears slipped down his cheeks. Rebecca smiled at him and then her mother. There were few memories in Rebecca's head as she stared at the woman who gave her life. "Mom I…"_

_ "I'm proud of you Rebecca," smiled her mother. It was a comforting smile that made Rebecca feel as if she was safe. "You turned out like I would have raised you. Phil did a good job."_

_ Phil smiled, "My baby, a field Agent with S.H.I.E.L.D. She'll stop Loki."_

_ "Foolish Midgardian!" Loki growled at Phil, "She'll join with me or I'll destroy every little thing she cares about!"_

_ Rebecca gave her parents a smile and a nod before turning to Loki, "Fuck you. Fuck your offer. I'll never join you. I'll never be your queen."_

_ Loki sighed and nodded, a rather grim look on his face. With another wave of his hand, Phil Coulson and Viola Owens were gone. He glanced at Rebecca with a frown, "I did hope you would join me Rebecca. No matter. If you will not willingly be my queen, you will be my unwilling pawn."_

_ "My teams will stop you. You'll end up in an Asgardian prison under the care of your brother," Rebecca spoke, breaking the silence that had befallen the icy room. "And this time you won't escape."_

_ "That sounds like a challenge my dear Rebecca," Loki laughed at her, sitting in his throne._

_ "No, Loki, it's a promise," Rebecca nodded as their eyes met one anothers. _

Like that she awoke, bolting up in bed. Her stomach felt uneasy and she made it only as far as the trashcan in her room before vomiting. The sound must have worried Clint, Rebecca though, because the door to her room opened. She was surprised to see it was Natasha wearing one of Clint's bathrobes. "Feeling alright?"

"Just a bit sick," Rebecca lied, wrinkling up her nose as she wiped the corner of her mouth with the back of her hand.

"Well if you're feeling any better later, we should talk to Thor about his brother. Maybe Loki left some clues behind on Asgard," Natasha smiled, "Get some sleep if you want."

"I've slept for far to long," Rebecca muttered, "Think I'll grab a banana from the kitchen."

"Why a banana?" Natasha asked questioningly.

"Dunno…I just really want some nanners," Rebecca chuckled, rubbing the back of her neck sheepishly. For a split second her mind thought back to the night she spent making love to Loki but she quickly dismissed it. After all, it had just been one night.


	19. Tell Me A Story

**XVIII: Tell Me a Story**

**A/N: Song title taken from a song by Phillip Phillips.**

For a moment during the day, Rebecca had feared pregnancy. Though it had only been one night, stranger things had been known to happen and Rebecca had to be positive. The thought of Loki having gotten her pregnant was worse to her than the thought of Loki defeating the new team, mostly because the rest of the team could help what happened to them. If she was pregnant, she could not help that. There was one thing Rebecca hated more than letting people down and that was feeling helpless.

On the way to Stark Tower to speak with Thor, Rebecca pulled over at the little mom and pop pharmacy that was nestled in between the high rises and apartments to grab a test. Of course she paid with cash, Tony having taught her that any purchase made with a credit card could be traced. The last thing she needed was for the people she worked with thinking she was compromised. She debated on when to take it and decided on when she finished talking to Thor. If she took it while at Stark Tower and it was negative, she could blame it on Pepper. The though made her upset at just how under handed it was.

When she finally arrived at Stark Tower, Clint and Natasha were waiting for her out front. The both of them looked much happier than she had seen them in the month she had been home. Had it really only been a month since she had been back home? That time frame seemed very short to her. "Hawk, Widow," she nodded, taking to the habit of calling them by their codenames. The last thing she wanted was to be in the field and call them by their given names, thus risking their private lives as well.

"Agent Barton and Agent Romanoff," Natasha corrected Rebecca with a smile. Though Natasha knew Rebecca was doing her best to act as a proper agent of S.H.I.E.L.D, Rebecca would always be the little girl who she taught ballet to in the living room of the Coulson apartment. "We NEVER use those names unless in hero mode."

"Hero mode?" snickered Clint, looking at Natasha with a raised eyebrow. He smiled at Rebecca, "She makes this all sound like a game huh?"

"It's not a game," Rebecca confirmed, "this is serious. Plenty of good men and women have given their lives to stop evils like this."

"Sheesh," Clint rolled his eyes as the trio walked into Stark Tower, "I was just trying to lighten the mood. I have a feeling when we talk to Thor things will get grim fast."

"What exactly are we talking to Thor about? How Loki got out of that prison or if he could clue us in on his brother's plan or what?" Rebecca asked as the doors to the elevator dinged open to allow them on.

"Exactly," Natasha nodded, "I thought it would be good for the team to figure it out. I invited your fellow S.H.I.E.L.D agents and the rest of our team to listen. Maybe we can piece together his plan before he has a chance to carry it out."

"What if Thor doesn't know?" Rebecca questioned.

"There usually isn't anything in Asgard that Thor doesn't know about. I mean, the guy is crown prince," chuckled Clint, obviously trying not to be worried about something.

"Are you afraid of elevators?" Rebecca frowned, glancing over at Clint.

"Elevators are fine. Heights are fine. It's the fact I'm closed in here," Clint replied, licking his lips, "I have a touch of claustrophobia."

As soon as the elevator opened on the top floor of Stark Tower, Rebecca was reminded of a high school cafeteria. There were definite groups of people who got along great with others. Damien and Alex were talking rapidly about some television show while playing chess, Emily was talking to Acrah and Jana about their outfits and the classes they would be taking at NYU the upcoming semester, Josh was engrossed in conversation with Steve about something Rebecca could only guess was military related, and at the bar Luke was drinking with Tony, Bruce, and Thor. "Hey everybody!" grinned Rebecca, trying to mask the realization of exactly how many people she had to lead.

"Becky!" grinned Tony as he stood, patting her on the back as she walked into the room. "Glad to see you!"

Rebecca chuckled and sat on the floor in front of the couch, "So, I hear we're gonna be havin' story time with Thor. Who popped the popcorn?"

"This is not merely story time. What I am going to be speaking of are things that could help us discover what my brother has planned for the entire world." Thor spoke gruffly, a tankard of beer in his hand.

"Sorry," Rebecca replied sheepishly, feeling like Clint had when she had told him this wasn't a game. "So, let's start, yeah?"

Thor stood with a commanding air, "As you all know, when my father perished I became king of Asgard. I brought Jane to live with me as my queen but soon we faced the threat of dark elves. I almost lost her…I…I made the hasty decision to ask for my brother's help."

"Hold up, your king now?" Tony asked, shocked.

"You trusted him to help you?" Rebecca asked incredulously. "He lied to you before and you trusted him?"

"Friend or foe, he is still my brother. I should have been able to trust him but I could not. Loki fled from Asgard and I lost him," Thor frowned.

"How long had he been gone?" Damien questioned, leaning against the wall.

"For ten months I lost my brother until recently," responded Thor, drinking from the tankard. "Why he chose Rebecca, Daughter of Coul, I do not know."

"I was an easy target," Rebecca frowned, "Loki was able to get close to me because of my upbringing. The accident that injured my leg, Loki planned it to make it like the one that Tony had. He sent me dreams to get me closer to him. My mind was weak."

"So what's his plan now?" frowned Josh, "No doubt he has something big planned."

"With the tesseract safe, there is only a handful of things he could do," Steve spoke, "Maybe he made another deal with the Chitauri?"

"The Chitauri were destroyed," Acrah corrected, "no alien race is brave enough to work with Loki. They know what the Avengers did to the others."

"He mentioned Hel," Rebecca spoke up, forcing herself to recall the dream of the night before.

A silence grew over the room, pale looks on some faces while others had wide eyes. "Come again?" Tony whispered.

"Loki mentioned Hel," Rebecca answered again, "He came to me in a dream last night. He offered me the fact that my parents could be alive for my cooperation. I refused."

"What does an Asgardian believe in a Catholic place like Hell for?" Jake asked, confused.

"Not Hell, Hel with one l," Tony corrected, "She is the goddess and ruler of the realm of death. She can grant life to people but she can also create the undead."

"Zombies," Alec bitterly chuckled, "Loki's planning the zombie apocalypse…"

Rebecca felt a pant of realization. Loki had offered her parents not just to have her on the side of evil but because he knew that she may have to face them. Suddenly pregnancy was the furthest thing from her mind, "So that's his plan?" Emily frowned.

"Could be," Rebecca replied, "And now that we have that to work with…"

"We'll plan for it. Team, let's get some work done," Josh spoke to the agents. He gave Rebecca a comforting smile as the S.H.I.E.L.D agents disbanded.

Rebecca excused herself to the bathroom to take the pregnancy test she had bought. She took it and then prayed for a miracle. After a few moments, she checked it and the result made her smile. "Thank God…false alarm…"


	20. Sittin' At A Bar

XIX: Sittin' At A Bar

A/N: Chapter title taken from the song Sittin' At A Bar by Rehab.

It had been a few days since the meeting with Thor to establish what Loki had planned for their world. As childish as it seemed, a zombie apocalypse was quite a fitting choice for Loki. He had to have seen the training sessions with her fellow agents at S.H.I.E.L.D, the zombie apocalypse being Alec's favorite. Loki had to have some deeper reason, something more sinister. Rebecca just hadn't quite figured out what yet.

Tonight was a rare night off. Between working with her fellow S.H.I.E.L.D agents, Alec had been building lots of quick shooting weapons with the help of Damien, and training with her team of Avengers, Steve had to show her how to use the shield effectively a few times, Rebecca had no alone time. With the few hours she did have free, Rebecca decided she would spend more time alone.

The bar was fairly empty except for a few patrons who were minding their own business. Rebecca sat by herself, thinking about her upcoming problem. Somehow, she had to find Loki and stop him from allowing Hel to create the army of the undead. Like that was as easy as it sounded. Finding Loki would be hard enough if he didn't want to be found. Telling him not to do something that could end up in a successful world domination plan was like telling a threatened snake not to strike.

Out of the corner of her eye, Rebecca saw a young man sit next to her at the bar. He was handsome, of that there was no doubt. Two emerald eyes sat in a friendly face that bore a smile and the slightest amount of facial hair. It reminded her vaguely of Troy…vaguely. "Hey," he nodded at her before ordering himself a beer.

Rebecca nodded back, noticing the dog tags that hung around his neck. "What branch of the service are you in?"

"Marines. Just got back from a deployment," the man replied, glancing down at Rebecca's dog tags. "You?"

"Army, been honorably discharged for a while," answered Rebecca as she sipped her drink.

"Honorably? You mean with an injury?" he asked, turning to face her. There was a caring look to his eyes, "I don't see no missin' leg."

"Not missing but damn near," Rebecca replied, sticking out a hand for him to shake, "Name's Rebecca Coulson. You are?"

"Lance Henders," the man smiled, shaking her hand with a twinkle in his eyes.

"Nice to meet you," Rebecca nodded.

Lance took a drink of his beer and nodded, "Likewise. So tell me, what's a pretty girl like you doin' in a bar on a Thursday night? Shouldn't you be at home with a boyfriend?"

"Have to have one to be with him," Rebecca shrugged, sipping her drink again. She ran a hand through her hair and looked at him, "Why aren't you doing the same thing with your lady friend?"

"In the same boat as you. Last time I had a girlfriend was before I was deployed," Lance shrugged back, "Ain't looked for someone else since."

"I can understand that," Rebecca shrugged as the bartender handed her another bottle of beer, "Sometimes life gets in the way of finding the perfect one to be with."

"I'll drink to that," Lance laughed as the two clinked bottles. A slower rock song came on the jukebox and Lance put his beer down, "You dance?"

"Not really, my leg stops that a lot of the time," Rebecca replied, though she liked the song. It was "If Today Was Your Last Day" by Nickleback. She was a fan of much Nickleback but that was definitely one of her favorite songs.

"Don't worry, I'll hold you up for the dance," Lance grinned a somehow familiar grin. Rebecca felt as if she had heard that statement with that smile before but she shrugged it off, "C'mon, support a Marine fresh from deployment."

For some reason, her judgment was screaming against it. The last soldier she danced and drank with was Troy Burton. She had fallen for a married man who took advantage of the situation, letting her fall in love while he didn't get attached. Not to mention the recent debacle with Loki. All in all, men were not something Rebecca knew well. Yet she decided that having that dance with Lance couldn't hurt. "Promise you won't laugh?"

"Promise," Lance smiled as he stood, his tall frame towering over Rebecca's. He held out a hand for her and she took it, glancing to see that he wore no ring nor did he have the tan lines of a man who hid his ring. He escorted her to the dance floor, wrapping his arms around her waist to support her. "Comfortable?"

Rebecca wrapped her arms around Lance's neck, smiling, "Comfortable." As the music played in the background, Lance led Rebecca in a comfortable dance. It was not the extravagant sort of dance she learned from Loki nor was it the simple shuffling of drunken feet she had once done with Troy. It was sweet, like a high school student dancing with someone they met from another school. As the song ended, Rebecca took a small step away, "That was nice…"

"Join me for some more drinks at the bar?" Lance asked kindly.

Rebecca obliged and sat across from him. A few beers later, Rebecca realized she had too much to drink. Her head was swimming and at this rate she couldn't drive herself home. She checked her phone, cursing the fact that it had died on her. "Hey…hey Lance y'gota cell phone?"

"Out at my car," Lance nodded, his voice not as drunk as she was, "Need help?"

Rebecca attempted to stand but stumbled, Lance having to catch her before she completely fell over. "Yeah, yeah I think some help would be nice."

Lance chuckled and helped support Rebecca to get to the parking lot. She looked around for his car but only saw her own. She supported herself against the bar's outer brick wall, Lance behind her as she spoke, realization dawning on her, "You're real name isn't Lance Henders, is it?"

The haunting chuckle was coupled with a familiar voice, "For being quite drunk, Rebecca, you are quite observant." Rebecca turned as quick as she could to come face to face with Loki. Before she could scream for help, Loki had his staff pressed against her heart. Her eyes went ice blue, a fog taking over her mind. It was if she was having an out of body experience, not able to control her own actions. "I told you, Rebecca, if you were not my willing queen that you would be an unwilling pawn."

A/N: To those who have kept up with, thank you! Please, read and review!


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